Werewolves often love forever
by MyTwiDreams
Summary: Rachel Black doesn't expect anything more than a two week vacation back at home in La Push until she meets a certain young man at the beach...
1. First beach

[Disclaimer] maybe I own my crazy fantasies about certain fictional characters, but I defiantly don't own the glorious Twilight universe. Every tiny bit of it belongs to the amazing Stephenie Meyer.

[A/N] I love imprint stories and this my attempt on writing one myself. So please tell me what you think about it ;-)

_***First beach***_

Just twelve more days to go, just twelve more days to endure this, just twelve freaking' days - you can do that Rachel. I repeated the words silently inside my head as if they were sort of a mantra. Like the perspective of these coming days would become less painful and somehow kind of enjoyable when I repeated them often enough. Just twelve more days.

Maybe I shouldn't have come here. Or at least I should have waited some more days till..... but this place would always be the most excruciating among all the places here that reminded me of her. My left hand searched for a fresh paper tissue to wipe my wet face. The freezing raindrops that were constantly falling down of the light grey sky melted together with the trail of fresh tears that were running down my face.

Crying didn't help anything. So I blowed my nose and tried to dry my face as good as possible. I continued weeding the few remaining wild flowers out of the small grave in front of my knees. It had been years since my last 'visit' to my mothers grave.

_"Sorry mom." _I whispered soundlessly while my finger caressed the fragile golden engraving on the grey marble stone.

****Sarah Elisabeth Ateara Black. Beloved wife and mother****

The rain was getting harder and so I decided to leave before I got totally soaked - and sick. That wouldn't help my plan on leaving home again as soon as possible.

I headed towards the old red rabbit, opened the drivers door and put the heat on as soon as I closed it behind me. The engine roared as I started it. Still couldn't believe Jake managed to fix that piece of scrap metal - that boy was really gifted with his hands. Maybe he could do some engineering courses at college when he would take school more serious....

That reminded me of that book I needed to read before my last semester started in fall. So I decided to pay the poorly equipped library of Forks a visit. I parked the car right in front of the old brick building....trying to shorten my walk through the icy rainstorm.

Of course they didn't have the book I was looking for -what a surprise...ha ha...But as I was there anyway I grabbed some of my favorite novels to distract me. Gone with the wind, Love story and Jane Eyre...yeah I know these are corny but I'm really a girly kind of girl when it comes to reading. Everyone has a weak point somehow - and just cause I loved to read corny love stories didn't mean I was sort of a romantic naive. In fact I was far from being romantic, that whole love thing...especially 'love at first sight' was just ridiculous in my eyes. I was the first one in my family attending a college education and I was really proud of it. When I managed to keep up my good grades I might even get a job abroad for some months....Argentina maybe or Chile. I loved Southamerica....in fact I practically loved any place that was hot and dry and didn't remind me of my wet Washington home state.

I asked the librarian if they had a book about drug abuse and she gave me a confused look through her thick glasses. Stupid small town Babitt....nobody in Seattle would be astonished by that question.....

She handed me a small paperback and I placed it on top of the other books I had decided on. The view through on of the large windows at the left side of the building showed me that the rain hadn't stopped yet. Well...I can read anywhere, I thought.

I sat down on one of the dark grey armchairs at the end of the corridor. My glasses were blurred from being in my jam-packed handbag so I wiped them an my red blouse. Oh man - how I hated that ugly black metal frame. It made me look like a complete nerd. The first thing I'll buy when I ever have some money left -what hadn't ever happened since I was fifteen and had started to walk around with that stupid thing on my nose - are contacts. Blue ones at the best...I'd loved to have blue eyes. They are gorgeous....so special....but maybe that was just cause everyone around me had brown eyes when I was younger.

What am I going to do if he's really on drugs? I questioned myself silently. Force him to do some therapy? This would never have happened if mom was still around....I swallowed back some lump in my throat and opened the first page of the book.

10 possible signs of drug abusement

1. physical changes

That part was defiantly true. When Jake and dad had picked me up I almost hadn't recognized my 'little' brother. He was nearly 7 feet tall, his once beautiful silken hair had been cropped short like a buzz and his face looked...I don't know... dark somehow...and he looked older than sixteen...even much older than me with my nineteen years....

2. attitude changes

He was depressed....the happy-go-lucky kid had somehow disappeared. He had barely spoken to me since I got home and his dark brown eyes always looked so sad....

3. social changes

Well, that part wasn't true. He was still joined at the hip with his two best friends. Embry Call - a very nice but shy guy and our crazy second cousin Quil Aterea. I had met Quil at the supermarket yesterday. Jeez...were the feeding them some illegal growth hormones?! But unlike my brother he looked really...happy...almost zeolous. He asked for my advice for a birthday present for some little girl he was babysitting. She was turning three next weekend and he wanted to buy her some Barbie dolls.

I laughed so hard at the worried expression on his face as he asked me if she could swallow some of the smaller parts like the shoes and might hurt herself.....

4. appetite changes

Jeez...could this boy eat....like a wolf. I wondered how my dad had managed to keep the house with the amount of food that went down my brothers throat. Yesterday he had four pizzas, 2 buckets of chickenwings and one family sized packet of oreo cookies - for one meal. I envied him that somehow....it had to be great to be able to eat that much food without getting fat.

I've been on a constant struggle with my weight since I was twelve. It wasn't really that I was overweight or anything....just really curvy...to curvy in my opinion....

The rain had eventually stopped...or was probably just having a small rest. Anyway....I decided to use it to get home with dry clothes. I shoved the books into my crowed bag and moved outside the brick building...avoiding the huge puddles all over the parking lot.

When I got home the house was empty. My dad had left me a note, that he would pay Sue Clearwater a visit for lunch and I had no clue where the hell my brother was. That was another stange point in his behavior. He seemed to disappear at the oddest times. In my first night I was waked up by some howling noises near the house. Holy crap....did we have wolves around the rez? The thought was frightening....yeah I might have been raised with this whole *wolves are our brothers - superstitious crap* - but I was smart enough to know, that I wasn't really keen on ending as a snack of theirs.........

As I gazed out of my window I could see him running towards the wood. Was he totally nuts? I waked my dad...but he just laughed at me and ensured me that everything was alright. Yeah...that's right - just close your eyes from reality...just like you did when mom...

**"Hi Rach!" **I cringed and a shrill sound escaped my mouth. Why the hell didn't I hear him coming? How could someone his size be that sneaky?

_"Hello Jacob, where have you been?" _He didn't look me in the eyes when he mumbled **"just been for a walk..."**

My brother was such a poor liar - and he knew it. _"In that rain? You could get sick..." _He shook his head and chuckled**..."Don't worry I won't get sick - I'm healthy as a horse."**

He made himself some cold cut sandwiches and munched them down quickly with a big glass of peach ice tea.

_"What did you do today?" _I knew that he was only asking me to distract me from his own 'secret activities'.

_"I've been at the cemetery and than I went to the library in Forks to get some books. Thanks for renting me your car by the way_. _That thing runs really fine..." _The corners of his mouth twitched into a small smile....not a real smile but a weak attempt....

**"How's your boyfriend...this Alex...you met at campus?" **I frowned - no need to remind me of that unfaithful piece of sh.....

_"It's over." _I tried to say it in a tone that made clear that I didn't want to talk about it anymore. **"Ups...I'm sorry Rach.."**

_"Don't have to be - might be better that way. So I can concentrate on my education - I'm not planning on wasting my time as a stay-at-home mom like Becca plans to..."_

**"Are you sure you two are really twins? You're so different from each other...." **I laughed at that...like I hadn't heard that before.

Me and my sister Rebecca are fraternal twins. She got the good looks - I got the brain. I didn't think that deal was really fair...

_"What about you - are you dating anyone, Jake?" _The expression on his face became a bitter mask. Oh great, Rachel...good idea to ask him that....

**"No.." **he seemed to hesitate before he continued to speak **..."there is this girl...I really liked...but she married that lee...that other guy." **

_"Sorry...I shouldn't have asked you...." _He shook his head**..."it's OK...doesn't change anything....but I still miss her. Isn't that weird?" **_" No it's not - I understand that better than you think."_

I tried to put an arm around his shoulder...it was like trying to hug a giant. And he _**was**_sick....his skin felt hot....too hot.

_"Are you running a temperature? - Jeez, Jake your skin is burning...." _He took three steps back and mumbled something to the kitchen floor. **"No -I'm not...I'm just a little overheated...don't worry..I'm fine."**

I shook my head and opened the cupboard to search for the meds. _"Maybe you should take some antipyretic pills...."_

**"Damn...Rach...I told you I'm fine and you're not my mother...." **_"Fine!" _I closed the cupboard with a loud cuff.

The stupid tears started to fall again...first cause I had to think about mom again...and second cause I always had to cry when I got angry...what an embarrassing habit....

**"Look...Rach....I'm ...sorry...you know that I didn't mean it like that..." **I cleared my throat and wiped my face on one of my sleeves. _"Yeah..I know that....you don't remember her the way I do...you were so young when she died. But I hate being in this house where everything reminds me of her..." _I sighed and decided that I needed some fresh air to calm down again - despite of the awful weather outside.

_"I'm going down to the beach for a little walk..." _After I had put one my old yellow rain jacket - the color made my skin look green somehow - I made my way through the misty rain towards the parking lot of First beach. Far away in the forest I heard a howling and shrugged. Well.....the wolves wouldn't come out of the woods - they're supposed to be very shy animals.

The beach was beautiful...one of the places I really loved here...one of the few I really missed when I was at college...

I sat down at a piece of white driftwood and glared at the thunderous dark waves of the ocean. The beach was nearly deserted - no wonder....who would go out in that freezing weather. About a hundred meters away from me I could see a huge guy ...who was only wearing a black t-shirt. What an idiot - I thought. He'll get sick that way - but maybe he was just vain and refused to wear such an ugly rain jacket like mine....

I started humming some old melody...I loved to sing when nobody could hear me.... than closed my eyes for a moment before I heard a unfamiliar husky voice.

_**"Miss?!" **_It was the t-shirt guy! Wow! From here he looked even huger....and brawny...hell...what a biceps... _"Ahh..hi" _I nearly choked at the words.... He didn't answer me - he just stared and stared... Oh crap - he thinks you're ugly with that stupid glasses and that coat...Oh please don't make him laugh...that'll be too embarrassing.....I closed my eyes again - hoping that he'll just leave...but when I blinked again...he was still there.

He was staring at me with his mouth wide open.... like he had just discovered one of the seventh world wonders or like a blind man seeing a rainbow for the first time....

His full lips turned into the most gorgeous smile I had ever seen on a guys face...and he was giving it to me...actually me. If I hadn't been sitting already my legs would probably have turned into yelly...

_**"Do you have a name?"**_


	2. Second to none

[Disclaimer] I don't own the heavenly Twilight universe - that honor belongs to the lovely Stephenie Meyer. I don't own the poem at the beginning of the chapter, but I think it's lovely

**##Previously on W.o.l.f.##**

Rachel Black is visiting her family back in LA Push. Her brother acts kind of weird and after they got into a little fight she takes off for a little walk on the beach..........

_****Second to none****_

_I want to travel around a foreign country,_

_wander through its mountains,_

_investigate its coasts,_

_mount the rough cliffs_

_and find hold in the life-saving projection._

_I want to feel those foreign winds...._

_and the warm rain on my cheeks._

_I want to dig my hands in its earth._

_I want to feel its roots...._

_taste its salt and inhale_

_the smell of his wide valleys._

_And I want to fight with the country,_

_match with its will,_

_explore our borders,_

_until the sleep comes and I bed myself down_

_on the sheets of its autumn_

_"Do you have a name?" _His voice was friendly and warm, but a little bit shaky. As if he were nervous somehow. Why the hell should he be nervous? OK - Rachel Black get your grip together and just talk to him.

_"Ra...ch...e ..l" _- I didn't know why I was stambling like a complete loser. He still smiled and his dark eyes were sparkling.

_"Hi, Rachel I'm Paul...I guess you're not from here - did you get lost? You shouldn't be out here in this freakin' rain...you could get sick."_

I giggled....I could get sick? He was the one walking around in a t-shirt....

_"What's so funny?" _I shook my head and put a wisp of hair behind my ears. "_Just look at you...Paul...you're the one who's supposed to get sick. Aren't you freezing at all?"_

He frowned and shook his head so that little wet pearls of rain were flying out of his cropped black hair. _"No ...I'm not...I never get cold...don't worry."_

Stupid guys I thought...always trying to act tough....

_"You don't believe me, do you?" _Could he read my mind? Well, maybe he was just really considerate. I wondered how old he was...in his midtwenties I guessed.

_"It's hard to believe that someone isn't freezing out here with only a t-shirt...." _He sat down on the grey sand right in front of me, his eyes never leaving mine. Somehow it sent goose-bumps down my entire spine...........

_"I'm not lying to you Rachel....I would never ever lie to you. You can count on that. So...shall I walk you back to your hotel now...we could have a cup of coffee...if you'd liked to?"_

Jeez..he wants to date you...my hands started to sweat a bit...crap...why the hell was I that nervous. I've dated guys before....well I hadn't dated anyone in the last five month....not since I caught that son of a b....

_"Actually you can't walk me back to my hotel." _The smile upon his face froze and I recognized that his hands were shaking slightly. Was he angry?

_"I'm not a tourist - I was born here and my family still lives in La Push....so I'm staying with them and instead of enjoying room-service..I got to sleep on this stupid airmatress. Boh I hate that thing...."_

Jeez...he was really easy to talk with and that was strange for me. Usually it took me a while to warm up with new people...especially guys. Maybe it was just cause I knew that I wouldn't see him again. Why not have a little harmless flirt while I was stuck here?

_"How long are you staying - I hope this is a *l o n g* visit?" _He was smiling so wide that I thought it would damage the muscles in his cheeks.

_"Only two weeks - trust me that's definitely long enough...don't get me wrong I love my dad and my brother but somehow I don't feel that I truly belong here. There are to many sad memories that this place holds for me. I only came here cause I couldn't find a proper excuse this time when my dad called me a few weeks ago."_

His hands were quivering again...he quickly shoved them inside the pockets of his clammy jeans. The quivering seemed to remind me of something...but I coudn't remember what it was....

_"Is your brother older than you, Rachel?" _He seemed to be interested in every boring detail of my completely boring life.

_"Younger - although you wouldn't think that if you saw him. He is huge....and I think that he's into drugs what is totally crap and my dad won't take my worries serious and acts as if everything was just fine - but I know better...."_

I looked at him and the view was frightening....his whole body was shaking. Was he about to get a seizure? _"Paul, are you OK?"_

_"Fuckin' dealer" _he hissed through greeted teeth_...."I can't believe that low life had the nerve_

_to come back to our land after we run him off. Why didn't we just rip off his ugly Makah-head like I wanted to...stupid Sam with his Alpha comments..."_

"Paul....are you sick?" I reached out for his hand to calm him but cringed back....his skin was burning like red lava in a volcano.

He didn't answer me...his teeth were still greeted together and his body was still shaking slightly. His eyes were closed and he seemed to be concentrating on breathing in and out very deeply.

After a few endless moments the shaking stopped. He sighed and opened his eyes. _"I'm sorry, Rachel...I was just so pissed and..."_

_"You got quite of a temper, don't you?" _He nodded once and looked down at his feet. I squeezed his hand, better a hot-head than a liar....

I cringed as I heard another howling deep in the forest. Paul raised up very quickly and gave me an apologetic smile.

_"I'll have to go now - hey can we exchange our mail-addys?" "Sure, we can..."_

Great Rachel...now you'll have to tell him that embarrassing address of it! Why didn't you change it. I felt my cheeks flush and was glad that he couldn't properly see it through the hoodie.

_"Alright, but promise me that you won't laugh, OK?" "I won't laugh - promise!" _

I sighed before I finally managed to bring it out - _"it's litte-red-ridding-hoodyahoo " _He bite his lower lip and seemed to concentrate very hard on not laughing. _"You're not afraid of the big bad wolf - aren't you?"_

Now I had to giggle myself. _"No, I've chosen this name to annoy my superstitious father. He told me that the pale faces interpretation of the wolf in their fairytales was an insult to our heritage. You know..this crap that we're descendents from wolves....What a load of bullshit..." _

He nodded in agreement. _"Yeah, I know these stories...better than you think." _The strange howling in the forest sounded nearer now, the sound made me shiver slightly.

_"I got to go now, Rachel..I'll mail you - really hope to see you soon..." _He waved with one hand before he turned around and ran off the beach..............

* * *

When I entered the house a strange burning smell hit my nose and grey smoke was coming out of from the kitchen. Holy crap!

My dad was sitting in his wheelchair and reading a book, not seeming to pay the slightest bit of attention to the smoky pan in front of his eyes.

_"Dad - what the hell are you doing?" "Are you trying to burn down the house?" _He looked up and smiled at me. _"Pancakes" _

I took the hot pan from the stove and opened the window. _"Crap, dad...you know that you shouldn't eat stuff like that. Why don't you eat an apple or steamed vegetables? All that sugar is not good for your diabetes."_

He frowned and than he laughed. _"Oh Rach...you're exactly like your mom - always trying to make me eat healthy. You're a darling child."_

I cringed as he mentioned mom, cause I knew that there wouldn't be one freaking' day in this house without me thinking about her.

_"And you should talk to Jake...I'm serious dad....something weird is going on with my brother and I know it. Don't try to play it down..."_

_"Rachel, relax....as I told you before...your brother is just fine....guys act strange when they're in puberty....no need to worry..."_

I frowned and opened the fridge to see if Jake had left anything eatable back there....

It was useless talking to my dad about my brother. He didn't want to see it - that his only son...had kind of a drug problem or crap like that. This Paul didn't seem to have any problems to believe me about that - he even seemed to 'know' that fuckster who sold that shit to the kids here...

_"I'm using your laptop to check my emails later, if that's alright. Oh..and I met someone at the beach today. He seems to be quite nice...a little weird maybe but he's really good looking." _

He smiled at me obviously relieved that I had changed the subject. _"And are you going out with him?" _

My face flushed deep pink under my copper colored face, so I looked down at my knees... My dad giggled - mean old man....

_"Well, probably...if Paul asks me too." _I whispered breathlessly while I was cleaning the mess that my brother had left behind him.

_"Paul?" _My dads voice made me look up. _"You met Paul?!"_

_"Yes dad actually...he seemed to be nice and he was really pissed when I told him about that drug thing. His hands were shaking - so angry did he get..."_

_"He didn't hurt you, did he?" "Of course not - why should he? He just seems to have a little temper..but I can deal with that.."_

My dad shook his head and I frowned. Jeez , that man would never be happy with my boyfriends. No one was good enough for his little girl. I had kind of a favor for blonde guys with blue eyes - kind of the Scandinavian type and my dad couldn't understand that at all. My dad was all about 'tribe pride' and our 'magical heritage' that was kind of annoying. Supersti....

I heard the front door slam and cringed. My brother entered the kitchen - he was only wearing a pair of grey cut off sweats.

What was up with the guys down here. Were they running sort of a *I'm so tough I walk naked through a snow storm* competition. This was just so ridiculous....

I glared at my brother - he glared back at me and looked pissed. What the hell was his problem. _"Are you OK, Jake?"_

_"Sure, sure" _Than he turned around to face our dad. _"Sam wants you to call him and talk about what happened to Paul..."_

My dad raised one eyebrow and nearly choked like he had forgotten how to swallow properly. _"Did...he? ...you know...what...I mean." "Yeah...exactly...that stupid piece of shit...Fuck! Why did it have to be him?"_

* * *

Review if you think that Alex Meraz who portrays Paul in the movies is hotter than a bottle of tabasco ;-)


	3. Third wheel

[Disclaimer] I don't own this heavenly place called the Twilight universe. Every tiny bit of it belongs to the lovely Stephenie Meyer. She knows how to make girls dream - I wished I was that cool.

[authors note] # thank you all so much for your lovely reviews and the alerts. They really put a smile upon my face for the rest of my day#

##previously on W.o.l.f##

My dad raised one eyebrow and nearly choked like he had forgotten how to swallow properly._ "Did...he? ...you know...what...I mean." "Yeah...exactly...that stupid piece of shit...Fuck! Why did it have to be him?"_

_****Third wheel****_

I sighed and shook my head while my dad wheeled himself over to our old yellow phone on the other side of the kitchen. Not one single word of the conversation between them had made any sense for me.

_"Hello, Emily this is Billy Black...is Sam?! Yeah exactly...ok..thank you, Em." _Holy crap - He was talking to that freaking Sam Uley! In my eyes Sam was just another proof that all man are liars and cheaters. He had been dating Leah Clearwater for almost four years - when suddenly out of nothing he dumped her. And the bittersweet cherry on the cake was that he dumped her for her own cousin - Emily Young.

What kind of a bitch would do such a thing to her own flesh and blood?! My dad didn't seem to think that anything was wrong with that. When he mentioned Sam in his phone calls, than his words were always full of pride and respect when it come to him.

Yeah..maybe men didn't see anything wrong in breaking someone's heart...just like that asshole of an ex-boyfriend.....

I decided to check my emails on my dads laptop. The old thing seemed to need hours to finally get a connection with the I-net.

I had three new messages. The first two were from my ex-boyfriend - so I deleted them without even reading them. The last and third one catched my attention.

The emailadress it came from was silver_wolfyahoo*com

**Hello little-red-ridding-hood *LOL***

**honestly Rachel...I really love your emailadress. That's so freaking cute. I'm actually much to cool to use the word 'cute' - so please don't tell anyone. It would destroy my whole reputation. ;-))**

**I hope you're brother didn't give you any crap about me?! He wasn't really happy about me talking to you on the beach today.**

**When I actually found out, that you're Jacob Blacks sister I couldn't believe it....you're so much prettier than he described you.**

**Stupid kid....**

**Rachel....I would really love to take you out tomorrow night. We could go out and see an movie - if you liked that. **

**Oh and yeah I know it sounds corny.... but trust me Rachel..it's the truth......somehow I can't stop thinking about you.........**

**Paul**

I read the entire mail four times. Every new turn the temperature in my face would increase again until my cheeks felt like they were burning like hot lava in a volcano. Somewhere deep inside my head a little voice tried to calm me. It was not like I was about to fall for him. I would only be here for twelve freakin' days, before I was off to college again. I wasn't looking for a new relationship....especially not here in my hometown. Come one - Rachel Black...compose yourself. You're not a thirteen year old teenage girl anymore - just because some gorgeous guy writes that he thinks you're pretty is not a reason to blush....

* * *

My brother was standing right in front of the opened fridge - Jeez would he never stop eating? _"Jake, are you angry with me, cause I spoke to one of your friends?!" _He glared at me for a short moment, before the ends of his full lips moved upwards into a grin. _"Paul and me...well..we're not really friends. We kind of_.."..he turned towards the fridge again_..."sometimes we do stuff together...for Sam Uley." _There he was again...Sam 'asshole_dumps_you_for_your_cousin' Uley. I was pretty sure that he didn't have such a good influence on my brother. And somehow...I was pissed, that Paul also had to do with him...Was he some kind of freaking' guru for the guys down here?! My mouth opened slightly and the words came out faster than I could close it again.

_"Jacob William Black are you taking drugs?" _...please say no, please say no_..."cause if you do...than...than I will practically kill you and make it look like an accident. How can you do this to dad?"_

He turned around and his body was quivering slightly, while his huge hand covered his mouth. I tried to breath in and out very deeply in order to calm myself, but it didn't really work.

Than he burst out into a loud laughter...."_you...think....ha ha...that...I'm into drugs....ha ha...jeez...Rach....come on...relax...you should know me better. I would never ever touch that crap. I've only been drunk once in my entire life and that was three years ago...and you know that it was Quil who stole his grandfathers secret rez moonshine supply."_

I smirked at him_..."Yeah I remember that glorious event - you and Embry were just sooo generous to help him finish the entire bottle before praising the porcelain god...yeah that was kind of funny. I'm sorry that I asked you about the drugs....I shouldn't have...but you...you seem so ...strange...somehow. It's like you become a completely different person in the last year."_

He nodded in agreement. _"I'm still your brother, Rach...I'm still me...I'm still Jacob Black - but you're right..I have changed...but I can't talk about it with you....not now...but maybe soon...although I honestly wish that I wouldn't have to tell you at all. I don't want this whole w...this whole thing here to bother you. I'm so happy for you and Becca, that you managed to escape from home..to have a life outside of the rez...I will never have that" _His husky voice nearly broke at the last words.

I put one hand on his warm cheek....his skin was still to warm under my cool fingertips. _"Of course you can leave - why the hell do you think that you can't? Because of dad? I think he's not completely helpless - and there is Sue - who could help him..."_

_"It's not because of him....not in the way that you think about...but it's still impossible for me to leave...." _His hands started to tremble slightly and I realized that this always seemed to happen when he was upset about something.

_"alright...alright...I won't ask again - different subject OK?!" _I took a deep breath before I spoke again. _" I'm going out with Paul - we're going to see a movie." _

He frowned...what the hell was wrong again now??? _ "I'm coming with you!"_

_"What?! Are you kidding me, Jake? You can't join me on a date -that's just weird..." _

_"You're going with me - or you not going at all, Rach...you're choice."_

Crap, my brother is a freak...I've always known it...maybe mom dropped him one time to often when he was a baby. He couldn't be serious about this.

"_He won't go with me, when I'm gonna tell him, that you'll be there. He'll probably laugh at me. Is this what you want, Jake?! To embarrass me in front of him?!"_

He shook his head. _"No...he won't laugh at you...I know that he likes you....and trust me...he'll want to go with you..even if I'll be there. I just don't want you to be alone with him...Paul has a little...well ...a little problem with his temper sometimes..."_

_"Don't you think, that I already know that - I don't give a shit about that. I can look after myself - holy crap...I'm older than you...I know how to handle guys. I went on self defense courses for gods sake."_

_"That won't help" _he mumbled towards the kitchen floor before he looked at me again. The whole thing here was starting to get ridiculous in my eyes......

About three things I was absolutely positive....First my brother was still trying to keep a secret from me....second.....there was a part of me that somehow already knew that this secret would change my life and third there seemed to be some emotional metal strings pulling me right towards it.....

* * *

Please review if you liked it :-)


	4. Fourth of July

[Disclaimer] I may own my crazy fantasies about certain fictional characters, but definitely not the glorious Twilight universe. That honor belongs to the lovely Stephenie Meyer.

_Previously on W.o.l.f_

„_you're going with me or you're not going at all. Your choice, Rachel…"_

_**Fourth of July**_

My brown eyes were starring back at me from the bathroom mirror. I was nervous and I could feel and actually see my cheeks getting warm and red. Well at least I wouldn't have to wear to much blush on my face. Not that would really help me anyway. I was so nervous that my palms started to sweat. Come on, Rachel -get your grip together. There is no need to be nervous. Plus you won't be here for long. So if you manage to embarrass yourself tonight - won't be that bad.

I still couldn't believe that Paul had agreed that Jacob could come with us on the date. On a scale of weirdness from one to ten - this was an eleven.

My brother was sitting in the kitchen and was talking to our dad who had invited Charlie Swan over for some stupid baseball game.

_"You look nice, Rach." _My dad gave me a warm smile and I frowned. Nice. Yeah - I always looked nice to everybody and Becca looked beautiful. It was stupid to be jealous of her looks, but I still couldn't help it.

_"Thanks, dad." _I mumbled towards the kitchen floor. Jacob was eating some cold cut sandwiches that had the size of an little island.

_"Oh as you're eating your dinner right now - does this mean, that you've decided not to destroy my life by embarrassing me to death and join me on my date tonight...."_

He raised one eyebrow before he giggled_. "That's just a snack - of course I'm coming with you. And I won't embarrass you. As long as everything goes just fine, you won't even recognize I'm there...."_

I sighed and tried to calm myself from hitting him on the head right now. Stupid boy...

The bell rang and I nearly fell of my chair and managed to spill the entire pitcher of beer over my jeans. Crap! I ran into my room to change while Jacob answered the door. I could hear Pauls voice through the door. He seemed nervous too. Why the hell should he be nervous?! He wasn't only the most gorgeous guy I've ever met but he also seemed to be really nice. Yeah - of course he's nervous. Who wants to go on a date with your dates brother.

When I entered the kitchen again Jake was cleaning the floor and Paul was sitting on my chair. Talking to Billy who had a strange tensed look upon his wrinkled face.

_"Hi, Paul." _He looked up to me and his lips twitched into that amazing smile that made butterflies in my stomach fly up.

Nobody ever looked at me that way before. Like I was something special - what I wasn't definitely. I have mirrors in my room. But Paul always looked at me like a child looking at the fire works of the fourth of July. It was lovely - and strange at the same time.

_"Hello, Rachel. It's so good to see you again. Are you ready to go?" _I nodded once and my stupid brother chuckled while he washed his hands in the sink.

_"Paul...I'm really sorry, that my brother is a freak. This is so embarrassing...." _He stopped me by putting one finger on my lips. I shrugged because I felt like a lightning had stroked me. His finger was so warm like fire, but somehow it felt good against my cool lips. I wondered what his lips would feel like...

_"Don't have to be sorry - like I told you before...I don't mind this little *pup* joining us. Maybe he can learn something from me. It's not that he's really good with girls. The lee.." _Jacob threw a can of soda towards Pauls head, who had no trouble to catch it with his left hand. Wow - pretty good reflexes...

_"Alright guys -let's go before anyone gets hurt." _Than I sighed - This was going to be a very interesting evening.....

* * *

We had decided to have some pizza first and than go to the cinema for some late night showing. I wanted to have some pasta with spinach fist, but than I remembered that I read in one of Beccas girl magazines that this wasn't a good choice at for a date night. Green stuff between your teeth isn't really encouraging anyone to kiss you. Damn it, Rachel. Why can't you stop thinking about kissing him. Like he would kiss you in front of your brother. Who's his friend...or not his friend. I wasn't really sure about it. Fact was that they seemed to know each other very well in a strange familiar way. Like brothers...yeah....they somehow act like brothers.

Paul and Jacob both had one family size pepperoni pizza for each of them which they finished of in a few minutes while I nibbled on my lasagna.

At least they both shared their weird huge appetite. The waitress was trying to flirt with my brother, but he didn't seem to notice her at all. Maybe she wasn't his type. She was a blonde and I think he preferred brunettes.

_"Can we have another cheese pizza, please?" _Jacob mumbled through his full mouth. Jeez - how much could these two eat?

I chuckled slightly and Paul looked up from his empty plate. _"What's so funny?" _

_"Well, it's funny, that you seem to have the same strange appetite like my brother. You both eat like wolves."_

He glared at my brother for a short moment before he started to cough loudly._ "Are you alright, Paul?" _He nodded and gave me a warm smile before he turned towards my brother who mumbled something in a very low voice. To low for me to understand him and what the hell was there to whisper about?

_"Well - I think it's just a guys thing. We actually need more food because we're taller and all that stuff. Plus me and this *pup* here - we're still growing."_

I raised on eyebrow and than I realized that I had never asked Paul how old he was. He couldn't be a minor -could he? He looked so much older - older than my twentyfive year old ex-boyfriend._ "Still growing? How old are..." _Paul cringed, somehow he didn't seem to like the question.

_"Paul is seventeen." _My brother grinned and Paul gave him a dirty look.

Jeez - I'm a cougar. I'm a Demi. Dating a minor, but anyway age was just a number, baby and Paul seemed to be very mature for his age.

_"Yeah and that Swan girl is what - nineteen now?" _I felt my brother stiffen and I could bite my tongue the moment the words escaped my lips._ "She was eighteen last September - and I don't want to talk about her...."_

Paul sighed deeply and glared at him._ "*We* also don't want to talk about her or think about her. Stupid, leechlo....I hate having that little paleface chick in my head..."_

In his head? Had they been dating? Was this Swan girl the reason they didn't like each other?

_"I never understood what your brother saw in her. She's not even pretty - much to skinny and pale for my taste plus she's really weird." _

My lips turned upwards into a wide grin. That was the cutest thing that he had ever said to me. 'she's too skinny' - I really loved that and I felt suddenly relived that he didn't share my brothers crush for the Swan girl. I could barely remember her. The last time I'd seen her was when we were twelve or so. Our dads had 'forced' us to go fishing. Not a very happy memory. I hated fish - I think it smells disgusting.

_"Oh and what kind of girls to you prefer?" _Damn it, Rachel. Why can't you ever think before you speak.

He looked into my eyes for a moment that seemed to last forever.

_"I prefer you, Rachel" _His voice was a warm whisper now...and his hand was inches away from mine on the table so that I could feel the heat radiating from it.

Somehow I felt the urgent need to be close to him. To touch him…like he was the light of a candle and I was the moth flying towards it...

* * *

The movie theatre was quite full when we entered the hall. I had to stand on my toes to see the scoreboard.

„_Horror or Romance?" _I asked Paul and smiled at him. _„Whatever you prefer, Rach. You can choose the movie."_

„_Well, Romance than. I'm not really into the whole horror thing. The only horrormovie that I actually liked was ‚Interview with the vampire' and even that scared the shit out of me." _I confessed –_ „Those vampires are just gross, with the fangs and the bloodsucking and all that crap. Yiah….the cold ones." _I shrugged and to my amazement Paul seemed to start to quiver slightly next to me. He couldn't't be afraid too, could he?

„_I wouldn't let them touch one single hair of yours, Rachel." _He whispered throw gritted teeth. I laughed at that and squeezed his warm hand for a short moment before my brother returned from the food counter with some popcorn in his hands.

The movie was stupid and corny, but I was't really paying attention to it anyway. I was to much concentrating on Paul who was sitting right in the middle between me and my stupid brother. I shouldn't't like him that much…It was wrong and stupid and corny –just like the stupid movie- but somehow it felt amazingly right and natural.

I felt my mouth getting dry and so I decided to get some soda._ „Are you OK, Rachel?" „Yeah…I'm just thirsty. I'm getting a drink. Do you want some?" _

A guy with blond spiked hair turned around in his seat and hissed at Paul. _„Shut up you idiot. We want to hear the movie and not your conversation with your girlfriend."_

A strange growl escaped Pauls throat and Jake placed on hand on his shoulder like he was trying to calm him down.

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a short moment.

„_Just turn around and mind you're own business." _I hissed back. Somehow I was pissed at the little looser in front of us.

I stood up and could hear Paul coming after me in into the lobby.

„_I'm sorry, Rachel. I didn't't mean to….I shouldn't…like I told you on the beach…sometimes I have some problems with my temper." _He seemed to be embarrassed by that.

„_Never mind…the little blonde idiot pissed me off too." _Now he was smiling again.

„_I don't mind your temper – although my brother dislikes it. He seems to be worried that you could hurt me…"_

Paul starred at me and his hands started to quiver for a short moment._ „Stupid, mutt…" _Than he sighed and took my face between his huge warm hands. His brown eyes were burning like flames. _„Trust me, Rachel…please….I could never hurt you…never…I'd rather kill myself than hurting you. You are so precious to me…so.."_

I drowned his words as I covered his gorgeous mouth with mine. It was pure instinct. No brain – just feeling. His lips was very warm just like his hands, I loved their warm touch against mine. He opened his mouth slightly and I felt him shiver as I moved my tongue gently over his bottom lip before I explored his delicious mouth with my tongue. He pressed me against a wall and his warm hands toyed with my dark hair..twisting it around his long fingers…

About three things I was absolutely positive…first…he was an amazing kisser….second there was secret surrounding him and third …I was falling in love with him…


	5. Fifth chapter

[Disclaimer] I still don't own the heavenly Twilight universe. Every single werewolf, vampire, half-breed or human in the Saga belongs to the lovely Stephenie Meyer.  
I just own a „little" obsession with some fictional characters

#thanks so much to my new beta meghann for helping me with this story#

Previously on W.o.l.f.

_Paul starred at me and his hands started to quiver for a short moment. _

_"Stupid, mutt…" Than he sighed and took my face between his huge warm hands. His brown eyes were burning like flames. _

_"Trust me, Rachel…please….I could never hurt you…never…I'd rather kill myself than hurting you. You are so precious to me…so.."  
_

****Fifth chapter****

I could feel an unfamiliar heat rise up my spine like flames of a fire as I felt his warm lips moving over mine. It was like drinking salted water. You drink it and your thirst increases. Finally I had to break the kiss because my lungs were screaming painfully for fresh air.

His left hand was still toying with my ebony black hair while his right one was holding my chin. Although I could feel the warmth radiating from my own reddened face, it still felt cold against his fingers. How could someone be that warm without being sick?

"Are you alright, Paul?" I gasped out breathlessly. He looked down on me, his brown eyes seemed to be glowing.

Instead of answering my question, he planted soft, featherlike kisses all over my face again. Every single part that he worshipped with his lips felt like it was set on fire.

"Of course, I'm not alright - I'm much better than alright, Rachel. But we should probably go back to the movie before your brother gets worried. I don't think that he'll be very happy about this." I frowned and sighed. I had almost forget about Jacob.

"Are you kidding me? That's between me and you. It is absolutely none of his business. I can kiss whom I want, where I want and when I want to!

"Well, I don't think he needs to know about it anyway. I promise not to tell him and if you promise the same, we'll be just fine." I was grinning all over my face now, because somehow it seemed ridiculous to me. But anyway, I wouldn't be in La Push very long so there was no need for fights with my brother.

"I promise to try not to think about it" Paul mumbled into my ear before he gently kissed the soft spot beneath it.

As we went back to the darkened movie theatre my brother raised one eyebrow. "I thought you were thirsty. Where's your soda, Rach?"

I cringed and cleared my throat. "Sold out."

* * *

I woke up the next morning much to early from a strange howling noise coming right of the woods behind our house. Stupid wolves. I rubbed my tired eyes with my cold hands. My back was hurting from the old, worn out airmatress and my head felt dizzy.

Yeah..this was going to be a very good day.

I stumbled toward the bathroom and splashed some ice cold water on my face. When I opened my eyes again, I recognized that my lips were still red and swollen from the kissing last night. My cheeks blushed and the ends of my mouth turned into a smile.

Your not going to fall in love, Rach. Every time you fall in love you start acting like there is something deeply wrong with your brain. This thing with Paul- I actually didn't even know if we had 'a thing' – it felt different somehow. Kissing him had felt natural….easy as breathing, necessary as drinking water..it was like coming home at last.

Suddenly I realized that he had been the first guy of my own tribe that I had kissed. I giggled while I brushed my hair and put it back into a low ponytail.

I decided to distract myself by making pancakes for breakfast for me and my family. Well, pancakes for me and Jake and some fruitsalat for my dad. Yeah, I know he didn't like to eat healthy things but I was determined to force him to at least give it a try. His diabetes wouldn't get any better from drinking Vitamin R with that Swan guy and munching down burgers and fries.

"Morning, Rach." my dad said with extra cheer. S_peak of the devil._ I gave me dad a warm smile as he wheeled himself into the small kitchen. He smiled back. "Hm..pancakes…..delicious…"

"Not for you, dad. I made you some fruitsalat" He frowned like a little child, that has been told to eat something disgusting like liver or spinach.

"Rach, your such a darling child, but an old man needs some _real_ food to start the day, plus you've made surely to much of those pancakes for yourself."

"They're for Jake, too – and fruitsalat is real food. I know that Jake doesn't give a shit about what you eat and what you do to your health, but I do."

"Your brother isn't here, he's at Sam's,"he started to pick around in the bowl in front of him,"helping him with some stuff."

I poured myself a cup of coffee into a red mug. "Can I at least have some coffee, Rach?" I smirked.

"Herbal tea would be better for your heart." I muttered.

„My old heart is in a pretty good shape, actually." he said oh-so-matter-a-factly.

I sighed and poured him half a cup before I added some milk to it. Low-fat milk, but he wouldn't notice the difference anyway.

"Well then I hope Sam Uley pays him well for making him get up this early in the morning on a weekend."

My dad swallowed his coffee and raised one eyebrow. "He doesn't pay Jake. It is an honor for your brother to be…" He cleared his throat, "well…he's doing stuff for the tribe….we discussed some things on the last council meeting on Wednesday."

"What kind of stuff? I think that you should actually do something about that wolf problem down here, before someone gets hurt…" I trailed off.

My dad choked and for a short moment, it seemed as if he had forgotten how to breathe.

"Rachel, there is no wolf problem. Nobody is gonna get hurt and you know that it's against tribal law to kill them. The wolves are our brothers."

I frowned and shook my head.

Superstitous old man.

"Dad you know that's kind of a bullshit. They could kill some of the hikers in the woods. They're much to close to the village."

"They won't hurt anyone –don't worry, Rachel."

"Yeah, right... because the very first question when a wolf runs into a human in the woods is "Are you Quileute? If you are, I won't eat you." I made my voice deeper when pretending to be a wolf.

" I always hated all that superstitious nonsense." I giggled slightly and my dad gave me a dirty look.

"You should have a little more respect for our heritage, Rach." I nodded my head and changed the subject. It was useless to start a discussion with him about that.

"Dad, you actually know that I don't like Sam Uley. I don't think that he's such a good influence on my brother or any young guy down here…"

"Sam Uley is the best thing that ever happened to this tribe." His husky voice was a little bit to loud and a little bit to proud for my taste.

I frowned and started to remove the breakfast ingredients from the kitchen table.

"I think Leah Clearwater woudn't agree to your opinion on him. Didn't he dump her for that Makah-girl? Her own cousin!"

"Her name is Emily Young and she's a very kind person by the way, and they're engaged now. I don't see what his fomerly kind of messed up love life has to do with his achievements for our tribe."

„Well dad, imagine me stealing away," I paused for a moment, "let's say Beccas husband. That's really weird."

My dad stared out the small kitchen window for a few moments, like he was searching for the right words to defend his 'hero'.

"It's not that easy, Rach. He had no choice, we all can't change what we are. Where we all came from as a tribe. Sam couldn't help it."

I bit my tongue and turned towards the sink. I ran the hot water letting it run over the dirty dishes.

_"I Couldn't help it, Rachel…"_ Exactly what Alex had told me when I caught him with the other woman. _"I'm sorry but I couldn't help it…"  
_  
All men are equal. They may all look different, but deep down inside they are all the same. I would never ever believe anything one of them would tell me.

"Can you do me a favor, Rach?" I turned around to face my dad who was still picking around in his fruit salad.

"Sure, dad. It's not like I have a lot to do as long as I'm here." I dried my hands on a white paper towel and sat down on the table again.

He took my hand and squeezed it slightly. "I know that you're a smart girl, Rachel. Much smarter than your siblings and I'm proud of you. But don't forget that it's your heart that decides what makes you happy and not your mind."

"That doesn't make any sense, dad."

"I know it doesn't –not now at least. Just do me that favor and remember it, will you?" he pleaded.

I nodded my head silently as I cringed from another howling noise. This time it was so loud that it seemed like the animal was right behind the house. I wondered what my superstitious father would do if one of our 'relatives' showed up in our living room.

"Can you drive me to Sue's?"

"Ah…yeah sure dad I'd like to. I haven't seen her in forever." I felt excited that I was going to see Sue again.

Sue Clearwater was kind of a second mother to me and my siblings. She was the person I used to talk to when I had '_girl problems'_ like my father called it. Her husband had died of a heart attack last year. Must have been really painful for her and her children, but Sue was tough. In fact I think that Sue Clearwater is one of the toughest people I've ever met.

When we entered the small green house of the Clearwaters Sue was sitting in the living room with her son Seth –who looked like younger version of my beefed up brother - and a bunch of papers on the table. Stupid bureaucracy crap. My dad had told me, that she was still having trouble with Harry's life insurance. Seth looked as if he could fall asleep any second. There were dark circles under his brown eyes. "Hi, Seth….boy…you've grown since the last time I saw you."

He gave me a warm smile.

"6'3 actually – but I'm still growing, Rachel. He yawned and his mother slapped him slightly on the head with a binder.

"Tired?" I asked him and he nodded.

"I'm not really a morning person, Rachel and I was woken up pretty early today."

"Did those stupid wolves wake you up too, Seth?" He glared at me with his mouth wide open and quickly turned his head to my dad who mumbled something towards the floor.

"Oh..no..I just had to..do some stuff…ah well..ehm…for…" the words came out stumbling because he was not only a bad liar but also someone who generally had a problem with lying at all. Seth was a nice boy and a honest soul. I didn't want him to have to lie to me. Maybe he had been on a secret date and didn't want his mother to know about it so I changed the subject.

"Where is your sister, Seth?"

"Leah is over at Sam's with the rest of the pa..well with others…helping him with some stuff." his head hung to the floor.

"I can't believe she's talking to that asshole again. She should kick his butt." I growled.

My dad frowned while Sue giggled slightly.

"Rachel Black! Language!" my dad snapped at me. His face was shocked, with slight disappointment.

"Most of the swear words I know I've learned from watching sports with you, dad." I smirked.

Seth stood up very quickly as if someone had called him,kissed his mother on the cheek waved goodbye to me and Billy, left the house within minutes without a jacket although it was almost freezing outside.

"How was your date, Rachel?" Sue smiled at me and her eyes were sparkling full of curiosity. I could feel my face turn red and that made her giggle slightly.

"Dad you gossip like an old woman. Did he also tell you that my brother forced me to take him with me?" I tried to make my dad look bad.

She chuckled and cleared her throat before she spoke up. „Paul must really…really like you that he agreed to that." her voice sounded genuine.

"Yeah I know he does. He's nice. I actually don't know what to think about him. He's not really my type and he's to young and I'm not looking for a new relationship." I practically lied through my teeth.

"But you like him anyway, I can see that in your eyes when you say his name, Rachel."

I felt my cheeks getting warmer…almost as warm as Pauls skin.

"Well, I-I-I,"

In that moment my cell vibrated in my pocket and I sat down on the sofa again to read the new text.

_I'm sorry the wolves woke you up, Rach! Meet me on the beach in half an hour._ Paul

About three things I was absolutely positive…first I was much more excited about seeing Paul again than I actually should be.

Second, if my brother would show up on my date again, I would make kible out of him and throw him to the wolves.

Third, good things were coming my way.


	6. Sixt sense

[Disclaimer] I don't own the glorious Twilight universe. This honor goes to the very talented Stephanie Meyer.  
She knows how to make girls dream – I wished I was that cool

# thanks to my beta meghann for helping me with this story# 

_Previously on W.o.l.f._

_"But you like him anyway, I can see that in your eyes when you say his name, Rachel."  
_  
_I felt my cheeks getting warmer…almost as warm as Pauls skin.  
_  
_"Well, I-I-I,"_

****Sixth sense****  
**  
**My poor heart was beating much to fast in my chest-almost like wings of a flower bird- As I walked towards him to the empty parking lot of First Beach.

"Hi there." he greeted me cheerfully, and smiled like a child given a Christmas present in June. I wondered why the hell he treated me like I was something special, when I so obviously was not even close to it.

Paul was glaring at me with this 'look' again, that sent shivers down my spine. Before I could calm down myself enough to be able to greet him back without sounding like a stumbling teenage girl meeting a boygroup member, I got the breath knocked out of me.

He pulled me into a bear hug and swung me around like I was sort of a rag doll and not a 120 pound -well alright-130 pound adult woman.

"Can't br-e-a-t-h-e" I gasped out and he instantly let go. His happy face was suddenly covered with a worried expression.

"I didn't hurt you, Rach? Did I?" His voice seemed panicked somehow and that made me giggle slightly.

"No, I'm alright. I'm not a porcelain doll, you know?!"

He put his hands around my waist and planted a soft kiss on my temple with warm lips.

I noticed that he wasn't wearing a jacket again,though the wind that was blowing around us felt icy on my cheeks. Yeah..maybe he was trying to play Mr.I'm-so-tough-I-walk-around-half-naked-in-the-snow once again. The thought made me giggle slightly.

The sound of my laughter made his brown eyes glow and his mouth turn into a mindblowing grin.

"I hope your hungry, Rach." I shook my head before I recognized the white basket that was standing right next to him.

"Had breakfast with my dad, after I woke up that early today from the wolf howling." I said, irritated. For a short moment the expression on his face hardened before he relaxed again.

"I'm sorry we-that they woke you up, Rach." he smirked.

"Don't have to be. It's not your fault that there are wolves running around in the woods. I actually tried to talk about it with my father –trying to convince him to at least set traps or stuff like that. Seriously, the howling was so near this morning I was afraid that 'thing' would end up in the house any moment." He cringed slightly and looked around as if he was looking for something in in the distance. I hoped that I didn't't frighten him, so I quickly changed the subject.

"What's in the basket, Paul?" I asked curiously while I twisted the fingers of my left hand with his. The warmth felt amazingly comfortable against my cold palm.

"Muffins" he smirked and pulled something out of the basket that looked like the plus size version of a chocolate muffin. It was covered with some pink strawberry frosting and small white crowns on top of it.

"Cute. Really cute…did you bake those yourself?" I wondered.

For a second it seemed like he was about to nod his head, but then he shook it once and started to chuckle.

"Well..no I didn't make them….but I practically had to endanger my life by fighting for them against the rest of the pa- well against the other guys." I raised an eyebrow.

"Emily made dozens of them for Claires birthday party." He confessed.

"Come on..how much of these giants can a bunch of three year olds eat?!"

I recognized that he had laugh lines around his eyes when he was smiling. It was gorgeous. He is gorgeous….

Damn it Rachel! _Focus_. No falling in love.

_Focus_. Your just here to have fun.

_Focus_. Stop that grin that's practically concreted on your face right now.

Paul was still holding my hand in his as we walked down to the beach. Somehow I was glad that it was still to cold for most of the people to go out, so that we literally had the entire beach to ourselves.

The ground was still clammy, so I took of my black hoodie and sat down on it in order to keep the rest of my clothes dry. I felt a shiver running down my bare arms as the cold wind from the ocean hit it.

Paul put his right arm around my shoulder and the warmth of his body sent a second shiver down my body. A good one this time. Jeez –this man should sell himself as an electric blanket…or maybe not. I'll rather keep him to myself. I had a very low blood pressure and so I got cold quite easily.

"Jacob told me that you won't be here very long. That's too bad." his face looked pained somehow as I nodded my head silently.

"You don't like being here in La Push, Rach." he asserted. Wow, he was the first one to bring this up to me and he didn't even know me. Paul had to be really considerate.

I cleared my throat before I answered him with a quiet voice. "'s right…don't tell my dad though, I think it would hurt his feelings. I hate being here. It's almost unbearable…sometimes.." I spoke deeply

Now his worried face was only inches away from mine as he quickly shoved his quivering hands into his jeans pockets and moved a little away from me.

He closed his eyes for a short moment and I could hear him breathing in very deeply.

"Why, Rachel? This is-well-your at home here." His voice was husky but still warm and gentle.

"It's because of my mom," my voice was barely a whisper now,"everything here reminds me of her. It's the same beach where she watched me building sand castles, the same shop where she buyed me oreo cookies, the same kitchen window that she looked through each morning..the same freakin' cross-way where.." my voice cracked at the end and I could feel the tears coming once again. I swallowed hard and tried to fight them back with all will power that I had. Come on, get your grip together! You can't cry in front of him. That's embarrassing.

I sighed deeply, wondering why it was so easy to talk to him, while I still couldn't do it with my family…not even with Becca who was closer to me than anyone else.

He cleared his throat and put one finger gently under my chin to make me look up to him.

"It's OK to be sad. I can understand that you miss her and I'm not trying to play it down by saying time is a great healer, cause I know that's bullshit. I don't think it will go away..but that doesn't mean you can't be happy here."

His other hand was toying with my hair now. "I want you to stay here."

Somehow it almost sounded like 'stay with me.'

I inhaled his intoxicating hot breath before his lips touched mine. My heart dropped two floors deeper and my brain went on stand by mode. I knew the warm cozy feeling that kissing made you feel in your stomach….but this was something different.

It was as if the world around me had somehow disappeared. I felt his warm arms around my waist…his lips covering mine. I could taste the strawberry frosting in his mouth and I could smell his scent that reminded me of cinnamon and fresh rain.

I could not feel, smell, taste or see anything that wasn't Paul.

Finally he broke the kiss and pulled me closer towards him, so that I was sitting on his lap now.

I felt my cold cheeks gaining warmth again as he started to plant kisses down my neck.

Jeeze, that man could make me forget my own name. I heard some laughter and screaming from a distance. Maybe some of those tourist idiots had decided to try surfing in the cold ocean again. At least I reset my brain again and I finally become aware of the fact that I was about to make out on a public beach with him.

I cringed at the thought of that and Paul instantly stopped kissing me and cupped my face in his hands.

"To fast?" he asked, almost apologetic.I nodded my head because I still felt a little to breathless to speak.

"Yeah,but mostly the wrong place." that made him giggle again somehow. Yeah I know that guys don't need a place, just an opportunity.

Like that stupid assh –damn it, Rachel. Why the hell are you thinking about him right now.

"I think I'll try one of those muffins, that you brought with you." he handed me one and I started to eat it. It was sweet and delicious….the kind of thing that was a second on your lips and a lifetime on your hips, but some things are worth that you get fat from them.

"Hm..mhm…they are so good. Who made them again?" I asked while licking my lips.

Paul laughed before he offered me a second one.

"No..no..one is enough. They are delicious though."

"I'm gonna tell Emily that you actually liked them. We usually eat up everything so quickly, like it doesn't matter if the food tastes bad or not." he chuckled slightly.

My face frowned for a little moment as he mentioned the Makah girl. Alright, she steals away her cousins boyfriend that should make you hate her. She bakes mouthwatering muffins that should make you love her and she got mauled by a bear in the woods that should made you pity her. I tried to remember if there was anything else that I knew about her.

There wasn't.

"You know her?" I shook my head and glared at him.

"My dad was very close to Harry Clearwater. Leah was my sisters best friend when we were in Primary School. I know that Emily is the one he dumped Leah for." I sighed, "this is a small place here. Rumors spread fast. Another reason why I don't like being here. I hate it when everyone has to snoop around in others privacy because the life around here is that sore."

The ends of his lips twitched for a short second when I mentioned the word privacy.

"Yeah, that's right. Never really have your mind to yourself down here. But I've learned to block out the listeners quite well.."

Paul twisted his hand with mine and started to draw fine lines around my palm with his fingers.

He looked tensed somehow, as if he were nervous.

"Rachel?" he said my name like it was something unbelievably precious.

"I want to tell you something about me…no that's not true…I 'have' to tell you something, about me."

I gave him a warm smile and squeezed his hand. "Well,than just spit it out, Paul." I encouraged him.

After all how bad could it be?

"It's not that easy.I never had to tell anyone about this stuff before. Someone that has no clue about the whole- well,ah-situation."I frowned and raised one eyebrow.

Maybe it,could be bad.

"You remember any of the old tribe legends, Rach?" I nodded my head silently. I could practically recite each one of them, but why the hell was he bringing up that superstitious nonsense right now?

"When you were a little girl..Didn't you believe that they were true?"

"Paul, when I was a kid I also believed that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy are true. Those are just fairytales. Things that were made up, because our ancestors couldn't explain some.." his face looked pained now and he sighed deeply.

"They. Aren't. Fairytales." He emphasized each single word.

There was a part of me that wanted to laugh on him like I always did with my father… but somehow I couldn't.

"I still don't understand what your talking about, Paul. Are we talking about you or the tribe legends?"

"Both," his hands were quivering again now, "I am-well-I'm a part of those legends. The wolf legends to be exact."He put one of his shaking fingers under my chin.

"I am a werewolf, Rachel." His face was so serious in that moment, that I felt the blood freeze in my veins. A breathetake later I was shaking with laughter..

"Ha,ha,ha.., and I'm the little-red-ridding-hood of Washington! Too funny." I laughed.

I glared at him and waited for the hardened mask to leave his face. Waited for him to start laughing over himself about that ridiculously joke. It didn't happen.

"I knew you wouldn't believe me that easily." He sighed again.

"I'll show you tonight if you want to. I HAVE to have you believe me, Rachel."

There is no full moon tonight,don't you need it to change?" I was still giggling.

Paul smirked and shook his head. "No I don't…this is no Hollywood movie. This is the reality. I can change into a wolf whenever I want to-well almost."

I shook my head. He was either crazy or he was an excellent sarcastic actor. Maybe a little of both.

A huge brawny figure was running down the shore towards us. It was my cousin Quil and he didn't look very happy to run into us. His cheeks flushed three shades darker…

"Oh hi,Rachel. Paul." He waved his hand and was about to turn around again when Paul bursted out into a mule like laughter.

"What's that on your face, Quil? The glitter and the,holy crap,Quil is that eyeshadow? Turquoise is not really your color." I had to laugh so hardly that my stomach hurt.

"Jeez – I knew it Ateara. You. Are. Gay."

"Yeah you wish!" Paul gave him a dirty look and his hands started shaking slightly. Somehow this always seems to happen when something pissed him off.  
"Cool down man…I wasn't about to disturb your date, you moron. I need to buy some of this,what the hell did Emily call it. Makeup remover? This crap is waterproof." He chuckled and shook his dark curls so that drops of the salty sea water were flying around.

"Why the hell did you do that,Quil? Was it a bet?" I knew that Embry loved to plead others into any kind of crazy bets.

Quil shook his head. "No. Well…Claire thought it was funny to try her new play makeup on me. It was fun for her, that's made it worth it."

"You have no pride at all, Ateara, Don't you?" Paul couldn't almost bring out the words through his laughter.

"I'll be what ever she needs me to be….Yeah like 'you' wouldn't do anything for your own imprint… my poor cousin." His eyes were sparkling now and he gave me a short smile.

Paul stopped laughing and hit him on the head. "I suggest you get this 'make up remover' crap before that glitter stuff incorporates into your ugly face."

Quil waved good bye to us. "Yeah, care, her the truth you idiot…as soon as possible." He ducked his head when Paul throw a stick after him.

"What is an imprint, Paul?" He glared at me and his eyebrows pulled together.

"That's not very easy to explain, Rachel. You remember that legend of the third wife?" I nodded my head. Actually this was one of the few stories I liked. Maybe because my mother had told it to be when I was a girl.

"The one who sacrificed herself for the tribe." I stated.

"Well she was the wife of the chief and he had other wives before her but she was-well-she was sort of his soulmate..but more. From the first moment he saw her..she was practically the center of his universe."

"Sounds pretty much like a huge crush to me." He frowned and took my hand in his.

"I'm not good- in explaining it. I'll show you the wolf thing first and then we figure out the imprinting stuff. Paul pulled me towards the woods so fast that I almost stumbled over my own feet.

He stopped in front of a giant moss covered rock.

"You'll have to wait here. Oh and Rachel,remember that I won't hurt you. I promised. Well I won't hurt you. So try to not to scream if you can."

I nodded my head like a puppet on a string. Everything started to get weirder and weirder with him.

Paul disappeared behind the rock and I was left alone in the middle of the forest. For a short second I thought that this was kind of a joke. Yeah. Lead the college girl into the woods and let's see if her smartness helps her get out of it.

But then I saw it-him-the wolf. It looked like a proper wolf with four paws, a tail and a snout that was showing razorblades sharp teeth. I put my glasses down and rubbed my eyes. It was still there. Crap! I'm going crazy. The wolf had about three times the size of a normal wolf. The grey colored fur reminded me of melted silver coins. My mouth felt to dry to scream so I 'whisper yelled.'

"Paul? Paul, where are you? This is not funny, man. I don't know how you did this but you have to stop and come out."

I starred and waited. I didn't know for what. Maybe to wake up in my bed, maybe for someone to shout out 'candid camera!'

Maybe for the wolf to attack me? Nobody would ever believe me and I would probably end up in an asylum.

The silvery monster in front of me let out a low growl that sent shivers down my spine. There was another howling and it seemed like that one was coming nearer.

I took two steps backwards.

Something rusty brown appeared through the trees. This one was even bigger than the silvery colored. Damn it!

The wolves were snarling at each other with frightening noises. It was scary. But if they would fight each other, then I could possibly run away from them.

Suddenly they both went silent and layed down on the ground, like someone had forced them to remain still. I sighed because somehow the silence was even more frightening then the howling.

I recognized that the giant russet wolf was starring at me with intelligent intelligent and too familiar for a wild was starring at me with my own mothers dark brown eyes.

"Jake?!" I gasped out breathlessly before my body hit the leaf covered forest soil.

About three things I was absolutely positive:

First, I was about to faint.

Second, I somehow had left the universe of sanity and logic.

Third, the two men I cared most about had turned into gigantic werewolves 


	7. Seven minutes in heaven

[Disclaimer] I don't own the heavenly Twilight universe. The entire Saga belongs to the lovely Stephenie Meyer.

#thanks to my beta Meghann for helping me with this story#

_Previously on W.o.l.f:_

_I recognized that the giant russet wolf was starring at me with intelligent intelligent and too familiar for a wild was starring at me with my own mothers dark brown eyes._

_"Jake?!" I gasped out breathlessly before my body hit the leaf covered forest soil._

..........

****Seven minutes in heaven****

I starred at the two huge silver and copper colored wolves in front of me and tried desperately to remember how to breath. Somehow it didn't work.  
The gasping sound of hastily inhaled cold air reached my ears, but nothing of this air entered my lungs.

I coughed and gasped and started to panic slightly. I hadn't had an attack since when? About ten years now?

The wolves started to howl again and blurred into the green forest surrounding me. My lungs were burning now from the lack of oxygen and I started to feel my head spinning, so I closed my eyes.

There was a sharp noise, like something was ripped apart and then I heard two familiar human voices.

"Rach? Rachel, honey can you hear me? Look, I'm so sorry." Pauls voice was I blinked and catched the pained expression in his beautiful face, I started to cough again. The hurt upon his face was torturing me even more than my breathing he quickly turned towards my brother who was kneeling right next to me on the ground.

"What the hell is happening, Black? Is she having sort of a panic attack? Do something, damnit!" I felt his warm quivering hands on my cold cheeks now. "Please, Rachel. You can't do this to me." he was nearly crying now.

"Don't touch her!" Jacobs voice was husky and hard. "Don't you dare to touch her. You've already done enough, Paul." Jacob was protective, not that I didn't mind it but I knew Paul would never hurt me. Ever.

Why the hell were they fighting now? About me? I wanted to tell them to stop this nonsense right now, but I felt to weak and to dizzy to speak.

A pair of warm hands were rubbing my back in circles now and I heard my brother whispering into my ear.

"Try to continue breathing, alright?" My brothers voice sounded worried as he rubbed my back. "Where is your Ventolin Inhaler?" I somehow managed to point towards my handbag, that was lying a few steps away from me on the clammy forest ground.

A short moment later the Inhaler was in my hands and after a few breathes my lungs finally relaxed again.

I inhaled the cold forest air greedily, like someone who has been under water for to long. This was so much better. I sighed and opened my eyes.

Paul was running around with a face that was so horrified that it sent shivers down my spine. I've never seen anyone so worried about me before. Like my pain was his own – or worse.

I cleared my throat before I tried to speak again. "Paul.." my voice was so low and raspy that I thought he couldn't hear me, but then he kneeled down right in front of me.

"Rachel..I'm so sorry. I can't tell you how damn sorry I am." He turned his head towards by brother.

"Shouldn't we call an ambulance? Or at least a doctor? I bet our leech-buddy Seth has Dr. Fangs number on speed dial. Fuck it, Black. Tell me what to do, damn it!"

I sighed and reached out for Pauls slightly quivering hand in front of me. Carefully I twisted my fingers with his. He exhaled deeply through greeted teeth and I felt the tension leave his body.

"I'm OK, Paul. That was nothing. Just an Asthma attack. I'm OK, you don't have to worry." I calmed him down.

The thing we should worry about was the fact, that he and my brother turned into monstrous wolves in front of my eyes. For a short second the picture of me in a rubber cell appeared in front of my inner eyes.

He hugged me carefully, as if he was afraid to break me. The warmth of his body was comforting and relaxing, like being shrouded into a warm blanket. My brother frowned and for a short moment it looked like he was about to hit Paul right into his face, but then he just kneeled down again in front of me.

"You're sure that you're alright, Rachel? You scared the shit out of me! I can't barely remember the last time, that you had an attack that strong."

"Yeah." I nodded my head and then the tears started falling incontrollable down my face. The last time I had actually had an attack was on my mothers funeral, when I tried to break up the nail shut coffin.

"Ho-m-e" I gasped out with a tear-choked voice. Paul carried me in his arms like a doll and I tried to protest. "C-a-n walk." He nearly had to chuckle at my ridiculous attempts to free me.

"Alright, Paul." My brother was speaking with a strangely hard voice now.

"You can help me bring her home now and then I want you to piss off. I can't believe you dared to phase in front of her. Sam told you to _tell_ her not _show_ her. Selfish ass.."

"She wouldn't believe me. Fuck, do you think, she would believe me that easily? She's smart."

"Damn it, Paul. I know she is. Why in heavens name, did you have to tell her at all. Who's best interest was that in...hers or yours? Fucking imprint, crap!"

"You know, she has a right to know. And you're just jealous, because the leechlo.." I seen Jake's face harden and he stepped closer towards Paul.

"That hasn't got anything to do with Bella." he growled.

"It has everything to do with her! Don't forget I know your thoughts, dumbass. And you won't make me stay away from Rachel….you fuckin know that.."

I cleared my throat and started a weak attempt to end their brawl. "Stop it both of you. Please..and could you also stop talking about me, as if i'm not here, Jake?"

"Sure, sure." he blushed.

....

As we stepped out the forest behind our house, Paul placed me carefully on the ground. One of his arms was still on my waist, as if to make sure, that I wouldn't fall over again.

"What will we tell, dad?" I glared at my brother and for the first time since he had transformed back into a human he smiled.

"Well..Rachel…he sort of already knows everything." Jake stuttered.

"He knows that you are..a…that…you…are…a..werewolf? Both of you?" I choked out, horrified that everyone would keep this from me.

"Now that the wolf is out of the bag, shouldn't we discuss this stuff inside? I don't want you to get sick, Rachel." Paul was worse than any mother hen.

My brother gave him a dirty look, as if the Asthma attack had been Pauls fault.

"Sure,sure." Jake rolled his eyes.

"Can you just stop saying that, Jake?" I said irritated.

That made Jake frown and Paul chuckle slightly. "You're tougher than I thought."

When we entered the house my dad was sitting in the small living room with a book in his lap. He was pretending to read, but I actually knew that the only literature that my father ever touched by choice were Sport magazines.

"Hi dad." I put my jacket on the coat rack. He raised one eyebrow and glared at Paul, who was still holding me around my waist.

"Hey, kids. How's it going?" he asked cheerfully. This man still had the nerve to act like everything was pretty normal around here. We sat down on the sofa, while Jake remained standing in the door frame.

"Yeah,pretty good I think. We went for a walk on the beach, had some muffins…then Paul and _your son_ turned into oversized wolves." My dads mouth fell open and for a short moment it seemed like he had forgotten how to close it again.

He turned towards Paul. "You told her? Did Sam.." What the hell did this Uley guy have to do with that? I hated hearing his name. The way they said it and spoke of him made him seem like he was in charge or something.

Paul nodded his head hastily. "She wouldn't believe me, so I phased in front of her to make it easier for her to believe it was a good idea." He was looking down at the floor now and I twisted his fingers with mine and squeezed his hand gently. After all, he was the one who had told me the truth, no matter how weird it was –- in contrast to my own family.

"Good idea." My brother hissed through greeted teeth. "She nearly choked from her Asthma, when she saw us. He should stay away from her as far as possible."

Paul started to quiver slightly and closed his eyes as if he were trying to concentrate on breathing in and out very deeply. I moved a few inches away from him.

"You-fuckin' know-that-I can't. I won't.." he spoke through his teeth, he couldn't stop shaking.

"Paul,you phase inside my house you'll buy it." Dad warned him. I squeezed his shaking hand again to calm him down. It didn't matter to me that he could actually hurt me by, what did they call it-phasing-right next to me.

I just knew I hated him to be upset. The very thought of never seeing Paul look at me again,looking at me the way only Paul looked at me and nobody else....this very thought was almost unbearable.

My dad gave me a worried look that reminded me of a weaker edition of Pauls face earlier in the woods.

"Are you alright, honey? Do you want me to call Dr. Gerandy to come and check on you?"

I shook my head quickly. Somehow I was afraid that the Doc' would ask me what had caused the attack and what should I tell him?! I could practically see that conversation with the grey haired physician from Forks in my head.

"You know Dr. Gerandy…..I was out in the woods for a walk and then two huge wolves appeared in front of me..howling and snarling at each other..…one of the wolves had my dead mothers eyes and the other happened to be my new…well..ah..boyfriend."

"Oh Miss Black…I think that you're had much to much stress the last months. Maybe you would like a little vacation in that lovely little asylum that we have in Port Angeles?"

"No, dad I'm fine. Really. It was just-well-I wasn't really prepared to see anything like that." I looked down to my toes while Paul gripped my hand tighter.

Jacob cleared his throat and gave Paul another dirty look, while he poured himself a glass of lemon ice tea. The whole situation felt surreal to me. There was my brother,my own flesh and blood sitting in our parents living room drinking ice tea. The same brother had turned into some gigantic animal that scared the living shit out of me.

I had taken several psychological seminars at college and still I never quite understood what made people turn crazy and made them end up in rubber cells. But somehow I was sure, that it was crap like that. Seeing things that you can't tell anyone that you've seen them, hearing things that you can't hear. Believe things that you shouldn't believe in. I wondered how long it would take for me to totally loose my mind.

I sighed and started rubbing my forehead with the cold fingertips of my left hand.

"Maybe I'm going crazy. I mean I saw them-you-but I know that I just can't have seen what I saw." My voice was so low now, that I wondered if they could understand one single word that was dropping out of my mouth right now.

"I know that it's true - it doesn't make any sense though – I mean, this can't is no rational explanation for what I've seen this afternoon. No other explanation apart from a lack of sanity."

Pauls lips twisted into a smile. "Your not losing your mind, Rach. We are werewolves."

"But why?" I turned towards Paul and instantly felt like a complete idiot for asking him that. Maybe there was no 'why' – all things were just the way they were. I couldn't think of any reason, why a human should be able to turn into a wolf.

"We're werewolves to protect the people in La Push from the vampires, like in those old legends of the cold ones." I cringed he mentioned the word vampire. It couldn't be that vampires were real to. Wasn't there anything sane or normal at all?

"Filthy bloodsuckers." Jacob hissed through his teeth with a voice that was so bittered with hatre it sent shivers down my spine.

My eyes met my brothers and I saw that his hands were quivering slightly.

A low howling coming from the woods reached my ears and glared at Paul and Jacob. If they were both here... who the hell was out there as a wolf?

Paul squeezed my hand again and kissed me gently on my cheek before he stood up very quickly.

"I've got to go, Rach. I'll text you later." Then he turned towards my father.

"Billy, I'm not going to lie to you by telling you that I regret letting Rachel in on the wolf secret. To confess the truth I'm glad she knows now, because it will make things a lot easier for us now." his voice was tender yet more confident in his choice.

My dads face was a hardened mask now. "Sure, sure" he mumbled into his lap. Well at least I knew from whom my brother had inherited that stupid expression.

Paul smiled at me for a last time and run off the house. Moments later another howling sound made the blood in my veins freeze.

Easier? What the hell was going to be easier now? He was freaking gorgeous. He could kiss me breathless, but he also was a fuckin' werewolf so what the hell was going to be easier now.

"Are you hungry, Jake?" Somehow I felt like changing the subject would be a good idea right now. I needed to do something 'normal' to distract myself from all the still unanswered questions that were spinning around my pained head.

"Like a wolf," he was grinning now so sheepishly that I couldn't resist the urge to laugh again.

I went into the kitchen and started to rinse some potatoes under cold water before I peeled them.

Yeah, everything is pretty normal, I repeated to cheefully in my head. Your just making dinner for your dad and your werewolf brother. When did my life became that weird?

Jacob opened the fridge and started searching for anything eatable left in there.

"Can we have steak, Rach?" I could hear the tension in his voice. He was trying to act normal around me, but the whole situation must feel as strange to him as it was to myself.

"Yeah..we can if you like. Oh! Can you also give me that piece of tofu in the red box down there?"

He raised one eyebrow. "Didn't know you were a vegetarian, Rach." I giggled slightly and shook my head.

"It's not for me, Jake. That tofu stuff is for dad. It's healthier for him then all that red meat.." I said oh-so-matter-a-factly.

"He's never going to eat that, Rachel." I frowned and started to marinate the steaks for me and Jake in a grey plastic bowl.

"Can I ask you a question…about this wolf thing?" I stumbled out hesitantly

Jacob raised one eyebrow. "I guess you have a lot of questions right now, don't you?" I nodded my head quickly and gave him an apologetic smile. The ends of his lips twisted upwards for a short moment.

"One question,Rachel. Just one 'cause I'm not the one who is supposed to answer these for you." He must be joking. One question? When I had hundreds of them popping through my head.

How many of you are there? Does it hurt? Why didn't't you tell me but Paul did? Why does dad know about this? Are you dangerous? What the hell has that Uley guy to do with that?

I tried to make a rational decision which question would be the most important to ask, but I was to exited and so the words just popped out of my mouth as soon as I thought them.

"Why do you hate the vampires so much?" He cringed and his eyes suddenly narrowed while his hands turned into slightly shaking fists.

"Of all the reasons-why I hate them,"he pressed out the words so slowly as if the were hurting him.''Maybe I mostly hate them because of Bella."

I tried to continue chopping vegetables with a small kitchen knife, but his hatre filled voice was frightening. My hands started shaking slightly and I dropped it on the linoleum floor.

"Bella Swan is a vampire?" A short memory of a long ago fishing trip flashed through my mind. A little skinny girl that was throwing up in our car, because she had injured her knee somehow. That little whiny thing should be a vampire.

Jacob put up the knife and rinsed it under the running water in the sink. His eyes were starring at the wall, it was as if he wasn't really there.

Probably he wasn't. At least his mind was not here, the guy next to me in this room was just an empty shell. He sighed and handed me the cleaned knife again. I took it but also grabbed his overheated hand in mine for a short moment.

"Maybe she's a vampire now,or she's-dead-I actually tried to decide what would be worse for me but I can't really."

He glared at me with tearfilled eyes...I knew he wouldn't cry now..not in front of me....but his face was showing so much pain by now...as the hardened mask left it for a short moment, that I couldn't resist the urge to pull him into a hug.

I petted his short cropped black hair with my fingertips just like I always just to do when he was a little boy.

"Why didn't you protect her...I mean from the vampires? I think that's what you're supposed to do as a were..wolf?!" Jake stepped a few steps back from me and sat down on one of the wooden chairs.

"You can't protect someone from themselves, Rachel. Bella wants to be a vampire,well maybe you should say that she wants to be with one of them. She even married him. Doesn't change anything though." he sighed deeply and his voice was getting a little higher towards the end. He had always been a bad liar...he probably couldn't even lie properly to himself.

About three things I was absolutely positive…

First, my brother was still in love with the wife of a vampire…

Second, I was already in love with a werewolf

Third, nothing and I mean literally nothing was ever going to be normal again


	8. Eighth wonder of the world

[Disclaimer] I own a brand new ticket for the Twilight triple feature but certainly not the copyright of the Twilight universe. This honor goes to the lovely Stephenie Meyer and those nice people from Summit Entertainment. 

#thanks to my beta meghann for helping me with this story#

This chapter is going to be from Paul's POV.

_"Trust in dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity"_

****Eighth wonder of the world****

The misty green grass felt cold under my grey paws as I rested my head upon them and closed my tired eyes for a short moment. I sighed and deeply inhaled the fresh forest air. Finally there was silence in my head, nothing but peaceful silence, which could only mean that the rest of the pack had already phased back. The only reason I had still remained in wolf form was that I could hear much better when I wasn't human. I could hear the wind blowing through the trees, the sound of squeaky wheels on the highway miles away, the chirping of birds, the purling of the nearby river and then I concentrated on a very different sound.

The sound that bound me to this earth more than gravity could ever do.

It was neither the overheated blood that was running through my veins nor the icy oxygen entering my lungs with every breath I took.

It was the beating of her heart.

Rachels heart. It seemed like I already knew every single one of it's different rhythms. How it quickened when she was exited about anything, how it jolted when she was nervous and how it seemed to practically flutter like wings of a bird when I kissed her. Now it was beating calmly and slowly in her chest. It filled me with an inner ease that I had never experienced before in my life.

Maybe she was sleeping now. I wished I could be right in her room to see if she was alright or just to watch her sleeping. I bet she looked gorgeous while dreaming, but of course there was no way I could sneak into her room at night. Jacob what probably smell me and I wasn't really keen on fighting with him. After all he was my imprints little brother, the man that my future children would call uncle one day.

If I hurt him, I would hurt Rachel and that was something that I could never endure let alone let myself do.

"Paul, you actually know that stalking is a federal crime in this country?" the sarcastic voice of our pack bitch made me jump up from my little daydreaming.

"Why the hell are you here, Leah? Can I never have some peace from the rest of you?" I looked up and gazed at the small grey she-werewolf that was standing right in front of me. She frowned slightly and rolled her eyes.

"Sam sent me here to tell you to go home. You can't stay outside her house all night like a fuckin guard dog." I snarled at her and a low growling escaped my throat.

"Stupid Sam and his Alpha orders. Why the hell did he sent you and didn't come himself? He among all of you, should be a little more understanding about this 'situation'."

"He's probably to busy fucking the shit out of my cousin." She tried to make her thoughts sound hard and emotionless but I could still hear the shaking in her inner voice. Being in Leahs head was like a constant nightmare, that nobody of us enjoyed to endure.

"Alright; I'm going home now but if anything happens to Rachel then I'll set the date for our Alphas funeral." She shook her head and a strange giggling sound escaped her snout.

"Come on, Paul! That girl managed to stay out of any danger for almost twenty years now. I'm pretty sure she will survive one more night without you."

"Yeah probably but still. Ah, I know I have no use talking to you about it; you wouldn't understand. Bye, Leah." I turned around and phased back to human behind a huge old oak tree, where I had hidden my cut-offs and some shoes. I pulled the dark blue shorts over my hips and runned my fingers to my shaggy pitch black hair.

For a short moment I thought about letting it grow out again, if Rachel preferred it that way but then I decided that I would have to cut it anyway. Long hair wasn't really an option as long as I was still phasing... just to unpractical.

My feet moved silently over the leaf covered forest soil as I walked back home.

XXXXXXX

When I woke up the next morning, it took me a moment to realize where I was. My room was still in almost complete darkness because someone had closed the curtains.

I stood up from my all-too-comfy-bed and rubbed my eyes as I opened them again and the lurid rays of daylight blinded me. Still half blind I walked into my bathroom and splashed some water on my overheated face. I brushed my teeth with some minty flavored toothpaste that left a burning artificial taste in my mouth. I combed the dark mess on my head and added some hair gel into its end before I dressed into an other pair of cutoffs and a blue button down shirt.

"Morning, sweetheart." My grandmother looked up from the pan that was standing on the stove.

I kissed her lightly on her wrinkled cheek. She gave me a warm smile and started putting a mountain of scrambled eggs with bacon on the plate in front of me.

"Nana you don't have to make breakfast for me. I can eat at Emily's with the rest of the pack." I told her while I poured myself a cup of hot fresh brewed coffee. Her eyebrows pulled together and her small lips turned into a frown.

"I met Miss Young at the store this morning. It is not right, that all of you treat her like she's some kind of 24 hour dinner. You have a home where you can eat, Paul."

"Did she complain to you about us?" I mumbled with my full mouth. Emily loved cooking.

"Of course she didn't complain! Miss Young is such a nice lady. She told me to greet you and invite you and your new girlfriend over for lunch today."

Suddenly I felt a heat in my face that had nothing to do with my abnormal bodytemperature.

"She is not my new girlfriend, Nana. Rachel Black is my imprint. That's a lot more and a lot more complicated." I stumbled out like an idiot. My grandmother sat down on the kitchen chair right across me and started lightly sipping on her coffee cup.

"You don't have to be nervous, sweetheart." Nervous? Who the hell was nervous here?

"I know she will love you, and she's such a pretty girl. Smart too. Sue Clearwater told me that she even managed to get a scholarship for Washington state and she comes from such a good family. The Blacks are practically…"

"I don't care about her family." I interrupted her. In fact; things would be a lot more easy for me and her, if she wasn't Jacob Blacks older sister.

Nana put her right hand into the pocket of her apron and pulled a light greenish envelope out, that was already opened. Not another one! Damn it! I felt the heat rise up my spine as my hands turned into slightly shaking fists.

"Can you try to stay calm, sweetheart or will I have to call Sam Uley again?" The chilly experienced way that she handled my temper with, was embarrassing and I didn't need another of Sams "you-have-to-learn-to-control-your-emotions-better-preaches" right now. So I just nodded my head silently and tried to focus on my breathing until the shaking finally almost stopped.

"Your mother wrote again. She got a new job in a hotel and she asks how you're doing in school." She handed me the letter and I ripped it into dozens of tiny pieces that fall down on the beige colored kitchen linoleum.

"I don't give a shit what this woman does." My voice was shaking now and I still tried to concentrate on not phasing in the middle of the kitchen.

"Language, young man." My grandmother gave me a look that was scarier than any vampire face I'd seen in my life. Full of disappointment and pity.

"Sorry, Nana. You know I didn't mean it like that. I just wished she would stop writing at all." I frowned and then reached down and collected the tiny paper shreds and throw them into the garbage can under the sink. A cold hand was gently placed on my left shoulder and I looked into her dark brown eyes.

"Maybe you should think about forgiving your mother for what she has done. It would make your life much more easier, Paul." The words came out very slowly and carefully, as if she had thought about them for a long time; she probably has.

"It wouldn't change a thing, Nana. Thanks for the breakfast" I sighed and kissed her cheek again before I headed out the door.

XXXXXXX

_Flowers _I thought before I knocked on the front door of Rachels house. I should have bought some flowers for her or a box of candy. Jacob had told me that she had a weakness for white chocolate. I tried to make a mental note to ask her about her favorite flowers. Jared had told me that things like this were important to girls. The little things that showed her that you think about her. Well I had trouble to think about anything else since I imprinted on her. I had been in love before, dated several girls since I was about fourteen. But comparing these short interactions to the emotions that I felt towards Rachel was like comparing a droplet of water to the entire ocean.

I knocked the door again because nobody answered me. Maybe she was still sleeping? I didn't want to wake her up. Then the door was pulled open very quickly and I forgot to breath as her eyes met mine.

She was so beautiful. I loved the way her gorgeous eyes sparkled like dark embers. The way her ebony colored, shiny hair fell down her back in soft waves. I wanted to bury my face in this silkiness. The adorable way her cheeks reddened when she was exited about anything. The way her scent filled my nose with the most delicious fragrance I ever smelled. Sweet like vanilla and red apples and something that was just Rachel. I didn't even have a name for it.

She was special.

Her lips were the best part of her face. That's why I saved them for last. Plump and red like cherries. The very thought of feeling her mouth on mine sent goosebumps down my spine.

"Hi, Paul." She greeted me cheerfully and stood up on her toe tips to plant a kiss on my lips.

"Hi there." My voice sounded a little bit to nervous for my taste. I hoped she wouldn't notice it.

I pulled her closer towards me. One of my arms was around her hip. Oh god how I loved her curves. Her hands were on my back now as I pressed her against the door.

And then she covered my warm mouth with hers and time stood still. The earth stopped turning. Everything around me suddenly disappeared into space. There was only her and me left. Only her soft lips on mine, only her tongue sliding gently over my bottom lip before I offered her willingly entrance into my waiting mouth, gently caressing her tongue with mine. Kissing her was pure heaven. Finally she broke the kiss and gasped for air. For a split second I was worried that she would have another Asthma attack, but then she giggled.

"What's so funny right now?" She leaned over and whispered into my ear.

" Don't turn around now, Paul but I have the feeling that my entire neighborhood is watching us right now. Yeah, and I was always the good girl and now I'm practically making out with you on the porch." Another giggling sound escaped her lips.

I didn't have to turn around to hear the voices around us. Me and the other guys had often enough been part of the latest rez gossip. Fucking hypocrites. We were running around at night to save their asses and they talked about us behind our backs like we were some freakin' drug addicts.

"Lets get inside, Rachel. That's gonna give these idiots a lot more to gossip about, and I don't want you to get sick from the cold morning air."

We went into the kitchen and she poured me a glass of peach ice tea before she started to search for something in the frigde.

"I hope you aren't hungry, Paul. I don't think that my brother left anything that's even remotely close to food before he left the house." Her voice was almost apologetic, as if it was her fault that the little cormorant had emptied the food supply.

I embraced her from behind and pulled her silken hair over her shoulder so that her neck was exposed. Slowly and carefully I planted a kiss upon it, her skin felt cool against my mouth. Hesitantly I ran the tip of my tongue up to her hairline. Damnit…she tasted better than any food I'd tasted in my entire life.

"Don't worry, I have already had breakfast at home, Rach." She gave me a warm smile and sat down on the kitchen table again. I noticed several hardcover books that were spread over the kitchen table. _Hospital administration _was the cover of one them. Oh god she's not only the most beautiful girl I've ever met but also the most intelligent woman I ever got in contact with.

"I didn't mean to disturb your studies." She quickly shook her head and twisted the small fingers of her right hand with mine.

"I'm glad you came over, Paul. I tried to concentrate on learning, but there are still so many other questions spinning around in my head, that I can't remember anything of the stuff I'm reading." Her beautiful voice sounded a little frustrated. Of course she had questions, everybody would have them after seeing other people turn into gigantic animals in front of their eyes.

"How many werewolves are there?" She asked and I started to draw small circles on her palm with my forefinger.

"Well there's me and your brother, but you already know that, Rachel. And then there's Jared, Colin , Brady, your cousin Quil Ateara and the Clearwater siblings. Of course we can't forget Embry Call and Sam Uley." Her beautiful face turned into a frown as I mentioned Sams name. Somehow she seemed to dislike him. "Sam is the acting alpha of the pack because he's the oldest with a decent was the first one to phase. I know that you don't like him, Rachel. I can see that in your eyes when I say his name, but he really is a good guy; once you get to know him. He really helped me a lot, when I phased for the first time."

Her lips twitched for a short moment and then she cleared her throat. "Well, he's your Alpha._ Not mine_, Paul." she spat then she raised an eyebrow. " What do you mean with a 'decent bloodline'?"

"You have to be a male descendent from one of the families of the last pack members. Your great grandfather Ephraim Black was the Alpha of this pack, together with your other greatgrandfather Quil Ateara and Levi Uley who's sister happens to be my very own grandmother." She raised her eyebrow for a short moment as if she was confused by my words.

"Embry Call isn't even Quileute. So why the hell is he in the pack if you need 'decent blood' as you called it."

Damn it; she was smart. It took us all weeks to figure out, that there was something strange about him phasing. We all avoided this unpleasant subject as far as possible.

"Well Rachel, I'm not really supposed to talk about this. All I can tell you is, that there are several potential candidates that could be Embry Calls biological father. Everyone of them married at that time which makes the whole situation very-well tensed somehow." Another frown appeared on her pretty face, she almost looked angry now.

"All men are unfaithful." She hissed through greeted teeth. "I'm never gonna trust one of them again!"

Again? What the hell had happened to her? Jacob had told me that she had a boyfriend back in college. Some stupid blonde guy with blue eyes and a college degree in biology. She had broken up with him a few months ago, but Jacob didn't really know anything about it. I hoped that I would never ever meet this looser in my life, because I already know that I would probably hit him.

For a short moment I felt the bitter taste of jealousy in my mouth, but I swallowed it down very quickly.

I didn't care about the other guys she might have cared for before. She cared for me now. I cared for her now. And I would do anything that was possible to make her trust me one day.

_Anything.  
_


	9. cloud number nine

[Disclaimer] The Twilight universe belongs to the very talented Stephenie Meyer

****Cloud number nine****

_Love comes_

_to those who still hope although they've been disappointed_

_to those who still believe although they've been betrayed_

_to those who need love _

_and _

_to all those who still love even though they've been hurt before_

Paul kept the fingers of his warm hand twisted with mine all the way out to Sams house. Now and then I had to remind him to look at the street and not at me while driving.

„But you're much more interesting to look at, Rachel." He stated and wiggled his eyebrows.

„We could get hurt, if you smashed the car into a tree. At least_ I _could break my neck or anything like that during an accident. This old thing doesn't even have an airbag. Jake told me that you guys heal practically within seconds. So you could just move out the wrack without any scratches on you." I chuckled slightly, but Paul didn't seem to find anything funny about that.

His eyes narrowed and a low growl escaped his lips while his hands started trembling slightly.

„Calm down. Nothing is gonna happen. I just wanted you to focus on the street, while we're driving through the woods." I gently started to pet his cropped hair with my fingertips.

Paul sighed and the trembling stopped. Yeah I was getting good in calming him down.

„I wouldn't survive that, too. Rachel. I can never survive without you anymore. You are my imprint, Rachel. Your joy is my joy. Your pain is my pain. Your death is my death."

For the first time since he had told me about the imprinting of the wolves it sort of understood it.

Paul and I were like two sides of the same page in the book of life. You rip one out and destroy both at the same time. I couldn't endure the very thought of him hurting, because his hurt would always be mine too.

„You won't get rid of me that quickly, Paul. I got great genes and I'm planning on getting very..very old."

Now he laughed again and around his eyes the small laugh lines showed up, that I liked so much.

He parked the car in front of a small grey house. There were flowers all over the small porch, which made it look very cozy.

I opened the passenger door as Paul suddenly grabbed my wrist and turned me towards him.

His other hand cupped my jaw before he planted a soft, warm kiss on my lips. I opened my mouth with a low moan and his tongue started to fight for dominance with mine. He sucked my bottom lip between his teeth and started to nib on it. A shiver went down my spine and I moved my hands around his back while I put one of my legs around his waist.

Suddenly Paul stopped kissing me and for a split second I was afraid that I get gone to far.

But then I heard someone chuckle and a knock made me jump back into my own seat.

Paul cleared his throat before he opened the door and greeted Embry with a dirty look.

„Ca –ll." He made his name two syllables. Embry blinked at me and raised one hand.

„Hello, Rachel. Good to see you." He gave me a shy smile and turned towards Paul who's hands had started to quiver slightly.

„Hi, Paul. Don't phase now, Jakes on patrol. He won't be happy about that. You should know better than to make out with Jakes sister in front of our Alphas house. You're lucky I was the one who caught you and not Jake."

„Just shove it, Embry. Mind your own damn business." Paul hissed at him.

I felt the warmth in my cheeks starting to turn them into a dark reddish color.

„We…were…not..making..out.."

Yeah I was great at lying, had always been.

I twisted my hand with Pauls again which helped him relax. A small smile appeared upon his face.

„Miss Black, are you ready to meet the alpha of this messed up pack?" I nodded my head and smiled in return. The truth was I wasn't very keen on meeting Sam Uley and his Makah fiancee.

A delicious smell entered my nose as soon as we stepped into the house. My stomach automatically started to growl and I realized how hungry I was by now. I only had one granola bar for breakfast, thanks to my little werewolf brother. To my surprise, Sam the alpha Uley wasn't there. He had been called to some emergency tribe meeting. What ever that meant.

A tall, slender woman with hip long shiny hair was standing at the stove and humming some melody to herself.

There was something about her humming while she was cooking that reminded me of my mother. Whether I wanted to or not, it made me feel at home.

Then she turned around and smiled at us. Well one half of her face smiled, while the other was constantly forced into a strange frown. There were three deep scars running down her face and throat.

I tried to focus on the good side of her face and not to stare. It was unpolite to stare. No wonder she preferred to live outside here, where she wouldn't have to meet a bunch of strangers every day.

People were cruel to those with face deformation and I didn't want her to feel uncomfortable.

I cleared my throat and gave her a small smile while I offered her my hand.

„Hi, I'm Rachel. You must be Emily. It's good to meet you."

„Hello Rachel, I'm so happy that you could come. Paul has already told me so much about you."

There was a sparkling in her light brown eyes that made her look beautiful despite of the ugly scars on her face.

„I hope you're hungry." My stomach growled again. We set down on the small kitchen table and she poured me a glass of homemade lemonade. It was cool and refreshing with slices of lemon and other fruit pieces in it. Emily was such a homely girl. Someone that would get along great with Becca.

She filled our plates with mashed potatoes, cornbread and turkey roast.

You're saving a girl from starving. My brother didn't leave any food for me when I woke up this morning. He seems to be constantly eating 24/7."

She took my hand and chuckled slightly. „You'll get used to their appetite. I just recommend that you never go to an *all you can eat- restaurant*. Trust me – I went to that Chinese restaurant with Sam and Jared and they nearly had to close that thing afterwards."

Embry and Paul sighed deeply.

„We have order to stay away from that Mexican diner in Port Angeles. We're not welcomed there anymore." Paul explained to me

„Why the hell are they called *all you can eat* then?" Embry mumbled with his full mouth.

„That's misleading advertising. That's a crime in this state as far as I know."

I took another gulp of that delicious lemonade. Emily should definitely start her own restaurant. The entire food tasted great.

„Emily this food is sooo good, your such a good cook. I'm going to put some weight on again if I spent to much time with you. When I just think about that strawberry frosting on those muffins. Hm.. I already feel my fat hips singing hallelujah.

Paul nearly choked on his mashed potatoes. „Your hips aren't fat, Rachel. And for the record – I like them just they way they are. Point."

„Well…thank..you." I looked down on my empty plate because I was very uncomfortable with compliments on my looks. When I had dated guys before it was usually despite of my looks. Nobody had ever told me that I was pretty. Nobody had ever made me feel pretty, but Paul did.

A phone started ringing and Emily wiped her mouth with a napkin before she stood up to answer it.

„Hello?" Oh hi, Leah!" She turned around so that she was facing the kitchen wall. She mumbled something into the receiver. „Hell, no….I already told you, that you can choose the color of the bridesmaid dress yourself. No..the pink fabric is for Claires dress. Yeah…I now Quil is a little pissed at me because I made those pictures of him with the play make up on. Alright, Leah..see you " She hang up the phone and sat down on the table again.

I tried to bit my tongue but once again the words stumbled out my mouth before I even finished the thought. Emily was a nice girl and I liked her, but I also had a huge sense for injustice. Being the bridesmaid on your ex boyfriends wedding, that seemed like a bad joke from a cheap movie to me. I felt flaming up anger raise down my spine. I wondered if that was the feeling that the guys had before they phased into wolves. Could that happen to me too? Leah was also a werewolf – so why couldn't I?

„You made her be your bridesmaid? Seriously? With the history she and Sam had? Don't you think that's cruel? Don't you think that she's suffered enough already?"

Emily cringed slightly as I was the first to confront her with that issue. Probably I was. Embry gave me a worried look and Paul put his hand on mine to calm me down. Paul – calming me down. Somehow it was weird and it wasn't working anyway.

Tears appeared on her eyes. Great now I made the fiancee of the alpha cry. I wouldn't come far in this pack.

„Emily, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. Paul explained the whole imprinting thing to me. It's just…I really feel bad for Leah. I know what it's like to be hurt."

She wiped her eyes on her sleeves and sighed deeply.

„You don't have to apologize, Rachel. Not for telling the truth. I feel bad for her too. I always will. My luck will always be her misfortune. And her misfortune will always be mine. Her pain will always be mine."

She sighed deeply and opened the silver medallion that was hanging around her chest.

Inside of it was a wrinkled old photograph of two small girls, wearing the same light yellow flower dress and little white straw hats.

„Cute" I mumbled hesitantly and started putting the empty plates together. I really needed something to distract my thoughts to not say anything wrong again. Paul and Embry stood up and waved goodbye. Yeah this was one of the disadvantages of dating a werewolf. As soon as someone howls in the forrest their gone.

Paul planted a wet kiss upon my warm cheek and hugged me tightly.

„There must be a reason, I've imprinted on you, honey. I wouldn't want to see you get *really* angry."

You seem to have a little temper yourself, Rachel."

I gave him a dirty look. „When we were little I cut the hair of all of Beccas dolls once, because I was mad at her. My mom made me apologize and cut my own hair short. It teached me a lesson. I really learned to control my mood from that moment on."

That made him laugh, before he pulled me into another hug and kissed my hair.

„Glad it grow out again. I love your hair, Rachel. It smells so good. Like vanilla." He inhaled deeply like it was some exquisite perfume.

„That's just the shampoo, Paul." I chuckled slightly.

He shook his head and twisted a small curl around his finger. „No, that's you. You're my favorite scent on this planet."

Embry dropped his keys on the floor to get Pauls attention.

„When you're finished with your *eau de Rachel* crap, we could probably get going now. Five bucks that, Jake will grab his teeth into your grey fur as soon as you phase. He doesn't like the thoughts you're having about his sister at all."

My cheeks turned warm again and they stayed warm even after the guys had left the house. I wondered if this constantly blushing would lead to permanent skin damages.

It would be worth it.

XXXXXX

When I entered the house my dad was sitting in our living room and watching some baseball game on the screen.

His right hand was gripped tightly around the remote while he was constantly biting his bottom lip.

"Hi, dad" I greeted him cheerfully and sat down on the sofa next to him. I planted a soft kiss upon his wrinkled cheek and that made him chuckle slightly.

"You're in a very good mood today, sweetheart aren't you?"

"Actually I am." A smile appeared upon my face that reached my eyes within seconds.

"Could that probably have anything to do with some silver colored werewolf?" He asked me rascally and raised one eyebrow.

Suddenly I felt the warmth spreading under the skin of my face again. I mumbled something towards the floor and pretended to rub some dirt of my sneakers.

"Hm..hm..." My father cleared his throat and started to stumble around like he had something very unpleasant to talk about with me. I wondered actually what it could be. Come on...my brother and half of the rest of the guys down here in the Rez are morphing into gigantic dogs because of some freakish *vampire coven* in the next city.

Yeah there couldn't be anything more uncomfortable to tell me about. Boy, was I wrong.

"Rachel, honey I don't really know how to tell you this. You're my little girl and I know you're smart and all that stuff. But now you're a grown up woman...and you are responsible. But I actually know how teenage boys think..Especially those with the werewolf gene. They are very hot-blooded...in every sense of that meaning. So if you continue seeing Paul..there are some things that you need to know when your relationship..well ah..gets closer."

My mouth suddenly felt dry like I had swallowed sand. That couldn't be true. He couldn't seriously be having that talk with me now.

„Dad…are you trying to have a sex talk with me? That's completely unnecessary – Becca and I had that conversation with Sue when we were twelve."

„When you were twelve you didn't have a teenage werewolf boyfriend that imprinted on you. He's going to expect you to..well you know..he might be probably expecting things from you..that you are not ready for yet." He stumbled the words out very slowly. It was obvious how uncomfortable the whole issue was for him.

I tried to think of the quickest way to end that embarrassment. There didn't seem to be any.

Don't..I repeated silently inside my dizzy head….don't tell him…that you're not a virgin anymore. That'll give him a heartattack.

„Dad, I really don't think that I want to talk about this with you. It's embarrassing for both of us."

His eyes moved to the tv screen, down to the brownish carpet and up to the row of family pictures on the left wall.

He sighed deeply and rubbed his eyes.

„Rachel, honey. I really wished that you're mom was here so that you could talk to her instead of me. She could do this so much better than me."

I felt a lump in my throat and tried to swallow back the tears forcefully. No, I wouldn't cry now.

Instead I forced a faked smile upon my lips and took his hand, that felt cold now compared to Pauls werewolf skin, in mine.

„You're doing great, dad. But I really don't want to talk about sex with you. And Paul would never force me into anything I don't like to."

„Sure, sure – but I'm not ready to be a grandpa now. If you..well..than..you..should.."

I sighed deeply and exhaled sharply through my teeth.

„Don't worry, I'm on the pill."

His mouth fell open. „you're what?"

Yeah it was a good idea to keep the virgin thing from him.

„ Ahh..it helps with the cramping, you know?"

He nodded his head and sighed in relief. There was a hesitantly knocking on the front door. I stood up very quickly and gave him a warning look.

„If that's Paul..you better not mention anything about that to him."

A devilish grin appeared on his face, that made me really worried.

„Dad..please!" My face blushed two shades darker. A low chuckle escaped his mouth.

„Sure, sure. Don't worry."

I put my messy hair into a loose ponytail while I walked towards the door. Another knock.

„Coming!" I called out cheerfully. Then I opened the door with a kick and the smile upon my smile went into a shockfreeze.

„ Alex? What the hell are *you* doing here?"

# pressing the little green button below makes at least one girl on earth happy. Shouldn't you use that chance :-) #


	10. tenth chapter

[Disclaimer] everything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

[A/N] alright there is a tiny little bit of physical violence and a little bit more of bad language in this chapter. Hope you gonna like it anyway. Feel free to tell me your thoughts.

_Previously on W.o.l.f._

„_Coming!" I called out cheerfully. Then I opened the door with a kick and the smile upon my smile went into a shockfreeze._

„ _Alex? What the hell are *you* doing here?"_

****Chapter 10****

My very first instinct was to hit him right into his beautiful face. I couldn't do that. That was not the way my mother had raised me.

So I just imagined the hitting part and balled my hands into fists until I felt my fingernails cut into the tender skin of my palms.

"Why are you here?" I hissed the words out through my teeth like they were venom in my mouth.

He looked at me, then down at his brown leather shoes, before his eyes catched mine again. Alex looked bad.

There were dark purple colored bruises under his swollen eyes. The light blue of his iris was surrounded by some redness. Had he been crying? Or drinking? Probably both.

He cleared his throat with a loud noise before he stumbled out the words.

"Rachel, baby...I came all the way out here to talk to you. So please hear me out, I'm bagging you." And while he was speaking the words to me, I automatically nodded my head. Not because I wanted to hear any of the excuses he had to tell me, but because I was kind of shocked that he was really here.

I had drawn a very strict line separating my home-life from my college-life. There was a home Rachel and a college Rachel. I hated the way people looked at me down here. My greatgrandfather Ephraim Black had been our last real chief, which meant nothing to me but a hell lot of much to a lot of important people in our tribe. It was something I could never understood. Who cared who your ancestors were unless you were the queen of England? Today we don't have a chief anymore. We have a council that is supposed to be made up of equals. Well the truth is that my dad still has a special position in this council. His word still counts the most.

Trust me there is nothing romantic about being the daughter of a chief. It means that superstitious old women want to pair you up with their sons, nephews or grandsons as soon as you start developing breasts. It means that every idiot around here thinks he or she has a right to judge any move you make.

Being away at college was a relief. For the first time in my entire life people cared about me and not about my family heritage.

I kept starring at him until I realized that he somehow expected me to answer him. I didn't really know what to say though.

„I'm going to get a jacket and then we can go for a walk. There is no need for you to meet my dad. He wouldn't like you anyway." I wished that I had managed to make my voice sound less whiny and more hard.

He still cringed at my words, although I had already told him, that my father was not very happy about me dating someone outside the tribe.

I let him stood on the porch like some idiot, but I really didn't want to give my father the chance to get his „boyfriend-speech" up on Alex.

My father was still sitting in our living room and focusing on the game now.

„Dad, I have a..friend here from college. I'll be showing him around the rez and be back for dinner with you."

I blurred the words out quickly and grabbed my jacket and my purse before he could start asking questions.

The first minutes with Alex were strange. Strange because I found out that I missed him. Really missed him. Well maybe it was not him that I missed that much but college life. I missed what he represented for me. When I was with him I wasn't Rachel Black the daughter of the Quileute chief. I was just Rachel, the smart girl.

We talked about how I did in my finals – really good, which didn't surprise him. About his new teaching job at a local highschool in Seattle, where he was supposed to teach Juniors Biology.

And he surprised me with the news that Amy and Eric two of my friends from college were getting married.

„They have too." He blinked at me with a sheepish grin upon his face.

„She's having a baby? No – way."

He handed me an envelope with a silver colored ribbon around it. It was the wedding invitation.

„Well.." he cleared his throat…"the invitation is for both of us. You know how Amy liked us being together."

I frowned and stuffed the invitation back into the envelope.

„I liked us being together too, you know. But you messed up when you decided to cheat on me."

His mouth fell open and it took him a little moment to be able to speak again.

"Rachel, baby. What happened with Alissa that night..that was nothing. It meant nothing to me. She means nothing to me, but you do."

„Didn't really look like a nothing to me when I ran into you." I rubbed my eyes and shook my head, trying to get the disgustingly picture of her above him out of my head. The noises that filled the room, that made me almost vomit in my mouth. I couldn't forgive him whether there was a Paul in my life now or not. The very thought of kissing his lips after he had snogged that perm-haired bitch –argg.

I felt a lump in my throat and tried to swallow it back, but it didn't seem to work. I coughed

„It was not nothing for me. You fucked her – you fucked her in the same goddamn bed, where you had fucked me the night before."

His eyes narrowed into small slides, like he was trying to concentrate on finding a new argument to defend himself.

„Rachel, baby. I am sorry. If I could turn back time, I would do that. Hell, baby it was just one freakin time. I swear it won't happen again."

I sighed and rolled my eyes at him. „Well..alright then..maybe I'll forgive you. Not today, but maybe one far away day in the future."

He hugged me tightly and swirled me around with an enthusiastic smile upon his face.

„I understand that you need time to forgive me. I can wait Rachel. I would wait forever for you. You are it for me. The only one I want to be with."

His words reached my ears and entered my brain. The problem was that none of them touched my heart. I didn't know what that meant – probably that I was a hardhearted person.

It wasn't even flattering for me.

„I have a new boyfriend, Alex and I really care for him. He's one of my brothers…pa..well they know each other from school."

A frown appeared on his face.

„A schoolboy? Rachel, baby you can't be serious. You are so mature..even for your own age. What can a schoolboy offer you? And since when are you into the guys down here. You told me that never dated anyone down here. If this is your way trying to make me jealous, that isn't working."

I gave him a dirty look and stepped two steps backwards till I was leaning against his car.

„I'm not trying to make you jealous. It's not like I've planned this. It just happened. And his age doesn't play any role in this. He's more of a man then you'll ever be."

His face reddened slightly and small pearls of sweat appeared on his forehead. He grabbed a paper tissue from his pocket and wiped his face.

„So …your..having..let's say a little flirt during your holidays." He was talking slowly, using his „teacher" voice on me.

I shook my head and almost had to suppress a grin on my face. „It's not just a flirt..this is something..something serious."

Now Alex looked pissed.

„You were hurt and he took advantage of you. Once you are back to college you will come to your senses again."

The end of his lips twisted up into a smile, that didn't reach his eyes. They stayed narrowed and tensed.

„I was your _first_ Rachel….that left a mark on you that you'll never forget. Never. Maybe you need a little reminder of it right now."

He cupped my face into his hands that felt cold against my cheeks and leaned forward to plant a kiss on my mouth. I thought about hitting him again, about telling him to get his fucking hands off of me, but it happened so quickly that I couldn't react before his mouth was on mine.

I turned my face to the side and wiped my lips with my hand. „Alex, I don't want to be with you anymore. I'm leaving."

He grabbed his hand around my wrist tightly. „Alex let me go!"

„I just want you to see sense, baby. You don't belong here. You're to good for here, to smart. Give us another chance." His breath was on my ear now while he whispered with a husky voice.

„Let…me..go!" I nearly growled the words at him as if that would somehow encourage him to let loose.

The grip around my wrist was so tight, that it started hurting. Alex had never been aggressive to me before. Never… but he also had never been really pissed at me before. I closed my eyes…trying to figure out whether it would be smarter to start screaming for help or hitting him where it would really hurt him.

„Take your dirty hands of her –right now!" I looked up again to see a very halfnaked..very angry looking Paul standing right in front of us. Alex glared at him but didn't move an inch away from me, instead the grip around my wrist tightened again when I tried to free my hand.

There was a strange ripping noise and then Alex was lying on the ground. A trail of fresh red blood running down his nose.

„Damn it, Rachel. Your neanderthal boyfriend broke my nose."

Paul grabbed him on the collar of his blue shirt that was starting to get purple spots where the blood drops fell down on it.

„You'll ever touch her again. Ever – it will be your last fucking move on this earth. I swear if you ever talk to her again, if you dare so much as to think about her. I'm gonna break every single bone in your body.

I'm going to rip off your balls and stuff them down your throat." Paul was quivering all over his body now and I knew that he was just seconds..split seconds away from phasing. His eyes were so dark that you couldn't see his pupils anymore.

The eyes of a wolf ready to attack.

I was scared shitless. My tongue tasted something salty upon my lips and I realized that I was crying soundlessly.

„Paul let him go. You can't loose it man, not in front of her." I turned around to see a huge brawny man with a hardened expression on his face coming towards us with quick steps. Followed by Embry, Quil and Seth. All of them in the same shirtless cutoff –uniform.

A low growl escaped Pauls throat and I realized that he probably hadn't heard him at all.

The man, whom I assumed to be Sam Uley glared at the quivering Paul that was leaning over a very pale looking Alex on the ground.

„Embry, Quil..get him away from here. Now!" They both practically jumped forward and grabbed Paul by his shoulders and moved him into the darkness of the woods.

Only seconds later a loud howling filled the air.

Alex looked up. „You..have wolves..down..here?"

Sam Uley gave him a pissed look. „Actually we have…and you better not run into one of them. You might not know it..but wolves can get really aggressive, when something pisses them off."

He offered Alex a hand and helped him stand up again.

„And I suggest you leave now – since you don't seem to be able to recognize when a woman doesn't want your attention. _We_ don't tolerate such behavior down here…especially not with on of the imp…..anyway…next time I won't stop him from breaking your bones. So you better not come here again."

Alex nodded his head, opened the drivers door of his car and started the engine.

„Rachel, baby…I'm sorry…I didn't mean to.."

I gasped for air but none of it reached my lungs. „Just..go." I croaked out and Seth catched me before I hit the ground.

The world around me starting spinning and I sat down on the cold ground trying to focus on my breathing.

„Do you need your inhaler?" Seth asked me while he rubbed my back carefully.

I shook my head, realizing that I needed something different than oxygen to make me feel better. „No..no..I'm going..to ..be…alright. Just need to calm down. Can you get Paul for me?"

Seth looked at me as if I had told him to get the tooth fairy.

„I don't know if that's a good idea right now. He won't be able to phase back in the next hours."

I coughed and cleared my throat. „And that means I can't see him?"

Sam shook his head and a smile appeared upon his hardened face.

„Well of course you can see him. You are his imprint, there is no way we can stop you from seeing him. The question is, can you handle being around him when he's not human?"

For a brief second I thought about the last time I had seen him and my brother in their werewolf form.

It had been frightening. But the thought of being apart from Paul for the next hours was much more frightening for me.

So I stood up with trembling knees and shook my head.

„I'll be ok with this. I don't think..no I actually know..that Paul won't hurt me."

Seth glared at Sam with a worried look on his young face and whispered „Sam..you know that, Jake won't like this at all."

Sam put one hand on Seths shoulder. „It will be alright. We won't let anything happen to her."

They guided me into the woods. It was already getting dark and I almost stumbled over a few twigs that were lying on the ground.

And then I saw him. Huge and silvery colored and looking so completely unhappy that it cut into my heart like a sharp knife.

„Can he hear me?" I asked Seth who nodded his head quickly.

„He just can't answer you. We're no fairytale wolves that can speak."

I would have probably found that funny, if the situation hadn't been all that tensed.

My feet moved towards the gigantic grey wolf in front of me. I wasn't scared anymore. There was no need to be scared.

„Paul." I whispered and my trembling fingers touched his fur very gently. It felt like silk underneath my fingertips. Warm and soft.

I buried my wet face into the thick silvery colored fur, inhaling his scent that made me feel at home.


	11. Chapter 11

[Disclaimer] I still don't own anything Twilight. Every tiny bit of it belongs to SM.

[A/N] I'm sorry for neglecting this story for such a long time. I had some serious writers block on this one.

This chapter is basically a juicy lemon and if you don't like reading citrus fruits…press the return button on your computer right now.

Thanks for everyone who read and took the time to leave a review. I can't tell you how much your kind words inspire me and make me smile.

****Chapter eleven****

Paul and I were still sitting on the small bed in his room, when the sky turned into a lilac grey again.

He twisted his warm fingers with mine and looked down at the floor.

"I can't tell you how sorry I am, Rachel."

I rolled my eyes at that and squeezed his hand tightly for a short moment.

"Would you please stop apologizing, Paul? I've already told you, that you don't have to."

Paul sighed deeply and started drawing fine lines on the purple colored bruises on my small wrist.

"Is it very painful?" He whispered with a worried expression on his face. I shook my head and forced my lips into a faked smile.

"No it's not, not at all." I lied halfheartedly and leaned my head against his bare chest. His scent was so intoxicating and warm.

"Can I tell you what the worst part of it was?" He asked me hesitantly.

I turned my head to look into his beautiful brown eyes. They looked so sad right now, that I felt my stomach tighten. I never wanted to see him unhappy.

"Sure, you can." I encouraged him, while his eyes never leave mine.

"The worst part was that I completely lost it…in front of you. I was so full of hatred for this fucking piece of shit in front of me that I was about to kill him. I wanted to rip the skin of his face and stuff it down his throat. I wanted to…" His whole body started quivering again slightly and I turned my head around to plant soft, featherlike kisses on his chest to calm him down.

"I'm glad you were there to save me and I'm pretty sure that you wouldn't have killed him."

He twisted his fingers in my long hair and put a finger underneath my chin to make me look up to him.

"Why?"

"Cause I know, that you would never do anything to hurt me. Killing a human being in front of me would hurt me for sure…..even it was just some asshole like Alex."

Then I sighed deeply and tried to avoid eye contact with him. It felt awkward to have this talk with him, but I felt that it was necessary. He had heard too much of my conversation with my ex-boyfriend.

"Are you jealous of him?" I asked hesitantly, already feeling my cheeks darkening into a crimson color again.

Paul raised one eyebrow in confusion.

"I slept with him…," I started to explain full embarrassment. "It's not like I'm proud of that. It just happened and I can't take it back."

His soft lips touched mine for a short moment, before he put a wisp of my hair behind my ear.

"I don't care." He whispered at my neck and his hot breath tickled my skin.

"Rachel, I love you….so much…more than words could ever say." His warm husky voice was almost trembling at the end of the sentence.

I felt my eyes filling with tears but I tried to swallow them back.

_He loves me…he loves me…he loves me_

His delicious mouth found mine again and I couldn't suppress a moan when his hot tongue licked the soft skin of my lower lip. I took his between my teeth and started to nibble on it very gently. A low growl escaped his throat and I felt a shiver running down my spine.

Then I felt his hands at the buttons of my red blouse and I literally stopped breathing. My heart was racing so fast in my chest that I feared it might jump out any moment.

Paul's eyes met mine again as if he was waiting for me to stop him. He's giving me the choice to stop now but I didn't want to. This felt so damn right. I smiled at him and nodded my head very slowly.

I closed my eyes and felt his long fingers unbuttoning my blouse until it finally slide down my back.

The air felt cold against my almost bare upper body and I quickly thanked my twin for that Victoria Secret Voucher she gave me for our last birthday. The cream white lace bra builded a beautiful contrast to my dark skin. Paul pulled me closer towards him, closer but not even close enough and then I felt him opening the clasp with shaking hands. He seemed to be nervous…or excited…or probably a little bit of both. God I loved him, all of him.

Paul was laying on top of me now and I could already feel something hard rubbing against my thigh.

"You are so beautiful, Rachel. I can't believe that I am allowed to touch you. You are everything I've ever dreamed of in my life."

Then his lips made their way down my collarbone where he sucked the delicate skin between his teeth, leaving dark red marks on it.

His hand start massaging my breasts very gently and I felt my nipples pebble under his touch. He was so good at this. My hands caressed all the way down his muscular back, enjoying the amazingly warmth of his copper skin.

Warm lips found my hardened nipple and when he started sucking on it another moan escaped my mouth.

When I finally open my eyes again, I could see that his were pitch black now like liquid ink with a small ember colored ring around his iris that reminded me of fire.

His tongue licked the way down my ribcage, leaving a trail of fire on every part of my skin that he touched.

My lace thong was already soaked by now I guessed. Had I ever been that turned on in my life before I wondered.

His right hand moved under the fabric of my skirt while his other one was stroking my nipples very softly.

When I felt his warm fingers touching the sensitive nub between my legs I almost began to tremble.

"So wet " He whispered into my ear. "So wet for me….only me." A low growl escaped his lips.

"Only for you, Paul." I whispered back. My own voice sounded unfamiliar thick with lust in my own ears.

He removed my jeans skirt and ripped the soft fabric of my thong of my body. God I wanted him so badly now, it was almost painful.

His shorts made their way to the floor very quickly and I gasped when I recognized that he's not wearing anything beneath them. I couldn't manage to take my eyes away from his throbbing erection, a small drop of pearly white pre cum started glistering at the top of it. He was so large that for a moment I feared that it would probably hurt like hell, when he entered me with this, despite the fact that I was not a virgin anymore.

Then I felt his tongue, his burning hot tongue, caressing my swollen flesh. He licked all the way down my folds until he reached the hard pebbled nub at the top. The tip of his tongue circled around my clit and I bit my own hand to keep myself from screaming out loud.

"God, you taste so good, Rach. Your pussy tastes so delicious…this is heaven."

Fuck. Hearing him talk like that turned me so on, that I felt my legs starting to quiver slightly.

"I want to feel you inside of me, Paul…Oh fuck…yes right there. Oh god, I can't tell you how I love feeling your warm lips on my clit."

He sucked the tiny nub between his lips and put two of his long fingers inside of me only moments before I convulsed around them in a first wave of lust.

I couldn't wait any longer to feel his hard cock inside of me and when I saw the lust in Paul's eyes I became aware that he also couldn't hold back any longer.

He flipped me over so that I was on my knees and he was kneeling right behind me. His warm hands grabbed my hips and I felt the tip of him rubbing against my slick folds.

"Paul, please. " I stumbled out. "Please…take me. Make me yours."

He entered me with one quick thrust and I gasped at the unfamiliar feeling of being stretched like this. He was filling me out completely and touched spots inside of me that had never been reached before.

"Fuck, Rachel. You are so tight, so fucking tight. Being inside of you is heaven. Oh god, I can't hold back anymore."

He started moving his hips against me faster and faster, until it was almost painful for me. Almost because the pleasure he was giving me during it, was beyond words. Then his fingers found my clit again and I moaned out loudly at the doubled sensation he was giving me right now.

I felt his cock even growing inside of me once again and I could feel that he was close to his own release, so fucking close. Small pearls of sweat fell down on my back as he leaned down over it to kiss my shoulder.

His thumb circled around my clit and I felt my inner walls tightening around him in a climax that was so strong it made me see colors in front of my eyes that I had no name for.

A moment before his cock twitched and filled me with liquid warmth, Paul's teeth found the skin on my neck and bit down, marking me as his mate forever.

We lay there afterwards, our breath still coming out rushed and quickly our naked bodies cuddled against each other.

"I love you, Rachel. I love you so much." He said my name as if it was something exquisitely precious to him and when my eyes met his, I knew that it was true.

"I love you, Paul…with all of my heart."

His fingers touched the reddish mark he had left on my neck.

"I'm sorry about that, Rachel. I don't know what came over me, when I did that. It was just some…"

"Wolf-instinct?" I finished and he nodded his head silently.

"It's alright, Paul." I assured him and squeezed his hand.

"No, it's not…this is going to leave a scar on your skin." His warm voice was full of doubt.

"It is a scar that is going to show everyone that I belong to you, Paul. You don't have to be sorry about that." Then I sighed deeply and cupped his face between my hands, enjoying the radiating warmth coming from his skin.

"I'm proud to be your imprint, Paul." I whispered and sealed his lips with mine, wishing that they could stay there for the rest of eternity.


End file.
